Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, June 19th 2009

Find out what the left’s new segregation is all about, and why the future crimes department of corrections might want to lock you up for harboring naughty global warming thoughts.

Still dare to be skeptical?  Step right on up, it’s linkage you can believe in, with 10% added snark.  But wait, read it now and I’ll include the global hottie for FREE.

Part One: Al Gore & Friends

Profiteer prophet Al Gore, blessed eco-blogger, is taking his talking points from newspaper ads.  Only died-in-the-wool green zealots or hopeless lefties could fail to see the irony of demanding cap and bend-over laws while making this argument:

“But when it comes to preparing our country to compete in the clean energy economy, the U.S. is losing and we lag far behind our global competitors. Even as our inventors create new technologies, we often lose them to overseas markets that have supportive government policies and incentives.”

Wasn’t BJ Clinton, Al’s ex-boss, that coined the phrase “It’s the Economy, Stupid” ?

He might have a couple of employees languishing in a NorK prison, but that can’t stop Al from moving Current TV into Canada.  Gore supporters take note, you too may be under bussed and forgotten this quickly.

Repower America has a new commercial in which a grizzled old farmhand tells us to ‘get real’.  See, farmers can talk hippie too.  Big Tom call the funding for the ads ‘mysterious’.  He ain’t kidding.

I believe the horse, personally
hey Mr. Ed, why the long face?

The patron saint of global warming will not be celebrated with a statue in Tennessee after all.  Good decision, since one of the two founded the infinitely corrupt United Nations and the other is Al Gore, it was only a matter of time before the effigies were given the full Saddam anyhow.

Newsbusters asks whether the weather will crack Al’s credibility, to which I snort and ask ‘what credibility?’

The Goreacle has 1 million acolytes on Twitter.  I’m not the sharpest hammer in the toolbag, but a million sounds like a lot.  Al was moved so deeply by reaching the milestone that he blessed the masses with this statement: “Wow”.   People swooned.  Really.  Meanwhile, Al has found time in his busy schedule to follow 8 people.  Seven of them he has direct ownership in, and the eighth, some Obama fella, could be described as a wholly-owned subsidiary (see Part Two).

Meanwhile, let’s check in with Canada’s own lovable raving moonbat hippie communist, David ‘jail ’em’ Suzuki.  DS had a busy week.  First he persuaded a food store to stop selling unsustainable fish, then he pondered what to do with GM now that ‘we’ own it.  Let’s peek into the hippie mind and see what’s going on in there:

…even private automobiles may eventually be a thing of the past; the idea of using of a tonne of metal and many litres of fossil fuel to get one person to the grocery store or work is more than a bit absurd.

Bingo! That’s the kind of thinking that will save GM!

I don't know what 'onfoods' are, but save them anyway
I don't know what 'onfoods' are, but save them anyway

Doc Suzuki was given a great honor this week when construction started on Canada’s First Eco-Indoctrination Camp for moppets.  It’s being named after him, the eco-totalitarian in chief.  It brings a tear to the eye.  Sniff.

Part Two: AGW Scaremongers

The UK Met Office dropped any pretense at scientific impartiality and offered local forecasts for flood, fire and pestilence created by global warming.  But they still can’t tell you what the weekend will be like.

Greens hate those damn dams.  I don’t get it, apart from the millions of tons of concrete, they don’t emit things, right?  Anyhow, they figure wind farms can replace dams.  It’s better to kill rare birds than common fish I guess.

dammed if you do...
dammed if you do...

Green power is full of crap.  Really.

Fun alert; it’s time for some green on green action! In the green corner we have animal protection groups, in the greener corner we have wind farms.  Forgive my schadenfreude, it might be showing.

More fallout from the greens new ‘death-to-deniers’ campaign. Having figured out that it might draw criticism to call for the execution and internment of people for asking questions, the deft left immediately turned to Steven Spielberg and Tom Cruise for guidance and have become chillingly interested in future crimes.  Guess I’m screwed then.

Meanwhile a used-rug salesman refused service to a respected scientist because he is a climate skeptic.  Welcome to the left’s new segregation.

At least the greens don’t have the police working for them yet.  Oh, wait, too late.

Future crime? Segregation?  If we don’t stop the madness soon,  next they’ll be talking about reparations.  Oh, wait, too late.

At least greens aren’t trying to physically harm power firm executives and their families.  Oh, wait.  Yeah, you guessed it, too late.

If you mind your own business and raise a family they’ll leave you alone, right?  Wrong, you breeding eco-criminal.

eco-criminals and their planet-killing offspring
eco-criminals and their planet-killing offspring

Waxman-Malarkey fallout, did the Dems use witness intimidation?  As if it wasn’t bad enough for those giving testimony that they could see right up Rep. Waxman’s nostrils, it seems that straight-man Markey might have tried a little of the ‘nice company you got there, shame if something happened to it‘ persuasion.

Greens are the new totalitarians?  Say it ain’t so.

Not as bad as I thought, naturalism has been hijacked is a good essay about the excesses of radical environmentalists.  It has nothing to do with the misappropriation of a plane-load of overweight naked people.  Just thought I should clear that up.

The IPCC, the mega-brains behind the super-consensus-that-must-not-be-questioned, might be wrongMust Read.

Alarmists sure know how to win hearts and minds.  Not.  That’ll teach ’em to leave a man’s meat and booze alone.

fun.  now verboten
fun. now verboten

Simon, the antipodean voice of skepticism, sees a hidden agenda behind the global warming movement.  He might be right.

Duke Energy, those behind the ad that Al was so pleased about in the very first link, is the green Enron.

Support Greenpeace, because not enough poor people are dead yet.

Jennifer Marohasy is still defining greens, and this week touches upon the unproven but often observed phenomenon that is celebrity genius.  However, before you get too comfortable, Marohasy has started a new series featuring skeptics.  This week’s entry proves a strong correlation between free-thinking and dodgy facial hair.

Alarmist Eric Pooley drops any idea of defending the global warming baloney and makes an appeal to what he thinks drives skeptics, greed.  In a column that he probably thinks has echoes of Gordon Gekko, Pooley encourages skeptics to embrace the green way, and make some green.  I don’t think his column means what he thinks it means.

Every day of the week is a thought-free day for Macca, which is the only explanation for why he married a one-legged harpie and wants us to not eat delicious dead flesh on Mondays.  Sorry, Sir Paul, I know you were a Beatle and all, but writing Hey Jude, hanging out with that Maharishi hippie and outliving John don’t give you the right to prise my steak off my barbie.

pillock
pillock

Meet Dan Farber, super genius lawyer who knows what you think, why you think it and that whatever you think is flat wrong.  Because he’s a lawyer, and a super genius.

ABC, the American TV network is pushing global warming as if there is no tomorrow.  Weather dude Sam Champion has bad news if you wish to retire to Florida:

SAM CHAMPION: If you’re thinking of retiring in Florida, think twice. Sea levels are expected to rise three to five feet by late this century.

Just a thought, but if I was to retire to Florida in the next 10 or even 20 years, I’m almost certain that whatever happened ‘late this century’ will not bother me.  It’s math, Sam, and it’s hard.  More here – did ABC make it up?

Bonus: the President Scaremonger Special Section

Did Obama’s climate czarina break the law?

put nothing in writing, ever.” This coordinated effort, led by Carol Browner, to leave no paper trail of the deliberations within the White House appears to be a deliberate and willful violation of the Presidential Records Act

Americans – calculate your pain from the cap and bend-over legislation, just follow Tom.

Obama’s administration jumped the global warming shark and went full retard on AGW.

Being President means never having to do what you tell others to do.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Green dystopia?  If it itches, see your physician.

Carbon taxes, only raising your taxes 50%.  For now.  How about $1600?  Got a spare $1600 for the guv’mint?

Pity poor Hopenchangen in Copenhagen, it never had a chance when the evil Chi-Coms said no.  Poor countries will have to go to all the trouble to advance and develop their economies now.  Bummer.

Cards, meet house.  If you build it, collapse will come.

If the science is settled and the debate is over and only a few loons don’t believe in global warming, explain how Ian Plimer’s book is in it’s 5th print run since its release a few months ago.

Argentine glaciers, not following the script.  Here is the Argentine’s BFF list of growing glaciers.

an inconvenient growth
an inconvenient growth

Global warming alarmists hate nuclear power because it can easily solve most of the problems they prefer to solve by wrecking economies, starving people to death and other fun with Ludd.  So they claim it is too expensive and dangerous, even though it is neither.

Biofuels saving the planet?  Or using huge swathes of land, consuming massive amounts of water and starving people to death?

The oceans are acidifying.  Oh, wait, nevermind.

Ration and Tax, or RAT.  You’re about to hear more about the RAT pack.

Stupid planet, doesn’t it know that wind power can save it?

Bjorn Lomborg, climate realist, eco-outcast and writer of annoyingly catchy tunes sung by super hot Scandi-chicks writes in a Taipei paper about the silly scaremongers behind the global warming hoax.

Alice, the rabbit-hole and Cheshire cats.  It’s still the Sun, stupid.  This link is not endorsed by Grace Slick, FYI, go ask Alice.

I don’t know what Duane Eddy has to do with climate, but vote for him anyway, it’s the minimum you can do.

..

Politicians talk warming as cooling kills crops.  Welcome to the real rabbit-hole.

Here’s a good link to the Top 46 websites to learn the truth about climate change.  No, The Daily Bayonet isn’t on it.  I choose to think this blogs’ awesome was too much and the others felt threatened, but that’s just me.

Say what?

It’s the Solar cycles, stupid.

Massive solar projects are threatened by an inch of fish.  Really.

Hey, the debate is over.  And part deux.  Also, don’t ask me what a blue lemon is.  I’m Canadian, I know what Labatt Blue is, what sky blue is and what color my fingers go in January, but I don’t know blue lemons.  Clear enough?

Emo-alarmist Joe Romm claims the Greenland Ice Sheet is melting faster.  Joltin’ Joe D’Aleo days notsomuchactuallykthxbye.

Thermostat, meet hypothesis.

GIGO.  Surface Stations survey 80% complete, and almost 70% of the stations are completely out of spec.

The Antarctic Ice sheets are melting, doom and gloom is imminent.  Oh wait, nevermind.

Is climate science green?  Not so much.  Ask the elephant.

Remember the MIT wheel of misfortune global warming model?  Well, MIT broke some rules.  More here.

Part Four: AGW in the News

Lorrie Goldstein is madder than hell and isn’t going to take it any more.

Not only is the BBC in the tank for global warming, but they have a super news predictor that gets the story before the story happens.  How cool is that?

More Nukes, More Nukes, More nukes.  Rinse and repeat.

doh!
doh!

Zombie bugs from Greenland, and zombie butterflies.  The sequel to An Inconvenient Truth will be directed by George A Romero.

An inconvenient (and illegal?) bylaw?

Aussie journalist forgot the script and asked an alarmist a hard question about global warming.

Americans don’t care about global warming, and Al Gore worries about his retirement fund.

Geo-engineering, what could possibly go wrong?

The Obama climate report, dismantled, discredited and dissed.

A fisking for the Age, wherein Simon gets proctological with a Fairfax title.

Brian Williams can’t wait for global destruction, apparently.

Green jobs you can believe in?  Not so much.

A skeptic is born, refreshingly.

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Part Five: Global Hottie

After a solid month of hotties that actually had something to do with global warming, it’s back to very thin and tenuous links again.  I mentioned Tom Cruise, the diminutive superstar of the wacky religion, and that means it’s ex-wife time for skeptics.  The Daily Bayonet is pleased to present, for a second appearance, Ms. Nicole Kidman as your global hottie.  What a way to cap a round-up.

nickid1That’s all folks, thanks for reading.

10 thoughts on “Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, June 19th 2009”

  1. Here’s my new favorite song by Shisha,
    B4 it goes wrong.
    It’s billed as “a cheeky look at the global warming issue – written and sung by Shisha”.
    Check it out. You’ll like.

    1. That’s pretty good, I might try and squeeze it into next week’s round-up. Thanks for the tip.

  2. Here’s my new favorite song by Shisha,
    B4 it goes wrong.
    It’s billed as “a cheeky look at the global warming issue – written and sung by Shisha”.
    Check it out. You’ll like.

    1. That’s pretty good, I might try and squeeze it into next week’s round-up. Thanks for the tip.

  3. hahhaha great round up bayonet. loved the call out of wind loving disillusionists and their ill-adviced bouts of energy comparison. Wind is the energy of the future, but not of today. Just ask belgium, who has 1/5 of its energy supplied by wind but has had its Co2 emissions steadily increase as well. You can’t base-load and peak-load with good-intentions. I am a nuclear supported because it is the most viable option for Ontario, (where i reside) right now. But the Ontario Libs have just passed the Green Energy Act, which calls for , you guessed it, a huge increase in wind turbines. I guess people just don’t learn from European blunders. you can read about it in my blog enviralment.wordpress.com

  4. hahhaha great round up bayonet. loved the call out of wind loving disillusionists and their ill-adviced bouts of energy comparison. Wind is the energy of the future, but not of today. Just ask belgium, who has 1/5 of its energy supplied by wind but has had its Co2 emissions steadily increase as well. You can’t base-load and peak-load with good-intentions. I am a nuclear supported because it is the most viable option for Ontario, (where i reside) right now. But the Ontario Libs have just passed the Green Energy Act, which calls for , you guessed it, a huge increase in wind turbines. I guess people just don’t learn from European blunders. you can read about it in my blog enviralment.wordpress.com

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