Science? What science?

There’s much excitement about the new study based on NASA data that Forbes suggested ‘blows a gaping hole in global warming alarmism.’

The study does, in fact, severely damage the warmist theory that the planet is in peril from a trace gas esssential to life on Earth, but it does not blow a gaping hole in global warming alarmism. It should, but it doesn’t. Let me explain.

For most climate alarmists, it’s not about science and never has been. If it was about science, Weepy Bill McKibben would be laughed into oblivion for insisting that 350ppm of CO2 in the atmosphere is a ‘safe’ level, Joe Romm would be seen as an emotional train wreck in the pay of a far-left organization and Michael Mann would probably be an unemployed lab tech with a grudge.

Yet to warmists, these guys are rock stars because they’re willing to spout nonsense that makes the incurious and the follower-set feel good about themselves. If it was about science, the debate might actually be over, but climate science is dodgy at best. No matter how many tears Weepy Bill sheds or how spittle-flecked the Rommper room becomes, as more and more evidence is collected, mankind looks less and less culpable for global warming. When there is any, that is.

Already one rebuttal has been published, but not of the science. First it defaults to the ‘consensus’ argument, then it disregards everything else because Roy Spencer is involved. Every good little warmist in the world knows that Spencer is a ‘denier’ who must not be listened to. They will read the rebuttal and perfectly valid scientific findings will be dismissed on nothing more sound than the notion that a consensus in science means anything, and that the pesky guy who nearly rocked their worldview can be ignored because he once accepted a free mug from a Shell station, or something.

So next week will be business as usual. There will be warmists, and skeptics. There will be warmists who turn into skeptics, and maybe even some skeptics who turn into warmists. And yes, there will still be deniers. Except that after the NASA revelations, the deniers will be the ones still pretending that their cozy little scam isn’t blown into a billion tiny little pieces.

Good luck with that.

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Oh wait, did I mention Weepy Bill? I did, didn’t I. Who wants some Charlize?

*click*

 

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, July 28th 2011

A hippie accidentally discovers the solution to the US debt crisis, Ethan Hawke has some ‘splaining to do and Australia gets its Kris Kristofferson on.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

The editorial department of the Bayonet is scrambling as we have a last-minute substitution for Hippie of the Week. Grist writer Robert Jensen was all-set for a moment of glory, but alas his victory was snatched away by the jaws of a polar bear. Almost literally. Instead, the HOTW is none other than polar bear researcher Charles Monnett.

Monnett has been placed on administrative leave while an investigation into allegations of ‘”integrity issues” is held. Specifically, it looks like Monnett made up a bunch of stuff about polar bears and global warming:

Gleason, the second author in both papers, has told the investigators that none of the polar bears in either article had anything real to do with global warming (and they haven’t even mentioned the term global warming) and Monnett has added this spin to his interpretations (which has surely sweetened his life until 2011, I add).

As you may determine if you study some literature, Charles Monnett is the world’s main scientist behind the idea that polar bears are increasingly drowning because of global warming – something that added a couple of scenes to Al Gore’s movie (which was a part of the investigation as well), too. Until these days, he de facto controlled the U.S. Arctic Wildlife research and decided about $50 million of its funding

"global warming you say? tell me more..."

How do you secure $50 million in funding for Arctic Wildlife research? Oh, wait, I know. Link everything to global warming.  I refer readers to a snarky line from many posts ago:

“If there is another extinction event coming, rest assured the only reason to blame mankind is because someone, somewhere needs a study funded.”

Climate science is all about money, always.

Part Two: Warmists & Alarmists

We’re saved! Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard is paying a high political price for her carbon tax, but it worked:

Australia has experienced its coldest autumn since at least 1950 for mean temperatures (average of maximum and minimum temperatures across the nation) with an Australian average of 20.9oC. This was 1.15oC below the historical average, and 0.2oC below the previous coolest autumn in 1960. It was also the coldest autumn since at least 1950 for Queensland and the Northern Territory.

The UK’s Minister of Silly Walks Energy and Climate Change Chris Huhne moved from calling skeptics Hitler to being none too pleased that Euro MP’s blocked his favorite green legislation. Huhne embraced the democratic process and accepted his loss graciously. Oh wait, no he didn’t. He demanded an enquiry into how much cash Euro-MP’s took from Big Oil. The ironing department tells us it may be Huhne who ends up facing charges for being a pervert, or something.

Weather is not climate, except when it’s summer. Clear? No? Okay let me explain again. Weather isn’t climate, except when it is. Got it?

the dog days of global warming summer. Siriusly

Hippies confuse me. If I understand things correctly, pumping water into the ground to release much-needed natural gas is bad, but pumping a dangerous pollutant into the ground to achieve nothing at all is perfectly fine. Did I miss something? Can Ethan Hawke explain the difference?

Oh noes, Gaia baked us all to death in five years ago. Wait, what?

Good news for warmists everywhere, FEMA has discovered some sea-level rise numbers that make the IPCC’s look positively wimpy:

…the rule for climate hysteria seems to be: Trumpet the infallibility of the IPCC when its numbers are scariest, but ignore the IPCC when somebody else has scarier predictions.

True dat. In other sea level news, a once-great Roman port now has a two-mile walk to the sea, and Aussie hippie Tim Flannery is possibly the bravest warmist since Al Gore.

Patrick Curry of The Guardian says hippies must resist capitalism:

Along with human overpopulation, the principal driver of the accelerating eco-crisis – anthropogenic climate change, biodiversity crash, destruction and degradation of wild habitat, and a virtual holocaust of animal species – is precisely capitalism. Far from being realistic, to propose as a solution more of what is causing the problem is nothing less than delusional.

Curry is a genius, maybe he should be put in charge of US debt negotiations. Or is that different somehow?

Al Gore (remember him) says the Great Lakes are in danger because of slightly milder weather allegedly caused by a trace gas essential to life on Earth. Or as he likes to call it, a ‘climate crisis’. Also, the Goreacle says US debt crisis is exactly like the global warming, because of the Tea Party, Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck, or something. Note to Al, you forgot to mention the Koch Brothers. Do try to keep up with the approved list of evil-doers.

NASA GISS colored the Arctic red, because it’s prettier that way, and also looks like it’s getting hotter. Which would be a wild guess since they have no way of knowing what’s going on North of 80.

Good news, another warmist hippie is behind bars. Tim DeChristopher, auction disruptor and starry-eyed hero to Weepy Bill McKibben faces a couple of years in the slammer for his actions. But Weepy Bill is inspired:

He [DeChristopher] didn’t damage anything except the pride of the Bureau of Land Management, when he posed as a bidder and won 14 parcels of land at an oil-and-gas lease auction. They were gorgeous pieces of land that he protected — but far more, he was acting on behalf of every landscape left on the planet. Because the oil and gas under that ground needs to stay there. The carbon it contains is, we now know, ruinous — it’s what is heating the atmosphere, setting new temperature records every day. If you sweated through last week’s record heat, if your crops are withering in the southwest’s epic drought, if you watched the Mississippi swallow your town — then Tim DeChristopher acted for you.

Minx the Merciless finds the IPCC’s Chief Railway engineer’s description of ‘Distinguished Scientist’ somewhat lacking:

To recap, then: Teske appears to have no more than a Masters degree. He has been a Greenpeace activist and employee for the past 17 years. Depending on which press release you read he is either an expert in renewable energy or on nuclear matters (in the Greenpeace world, these are not the same thing). Perhaps Pachauri and journalist Stanford would care to explain which part of Teske’s CV makes him a distinguished scientist.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Climate science is dismantled in a comparison of the junk being peddled today with climate science from the 1960’s:

…these difficult and technical questions were studied rationally in the 1960s; but they are no longer studied rationally today. The contemporary authors such as Solomon et al. have neither the expertise nor the scientific integrity to figure out where the aerosols are coming from and what’s happening with them. Consequently, they can’t make any justifiable predictions about the future evolution of the concentrations of these aerosols, either.

Instead of analyzing hundreds of numbers describing various elements etc. in the aerosol samples – which is what the 1965 paper is made out of – Solomon et al. are only interested in one, scientifically unimportant number – the average forcing that aerosols may be adding or subtracting from the energy fluxes that determine the global mean temperature. Needless to say, they usually want to show that this number is low because aerosols shouldn’t threaten the “climate monopoly” that has been assigned to the carbon dioxide by all these assholes. On the other hand, when they’re running into real trouble – e.g. when they predict a huge warming for a decade but they get a cooling – they want the aerosols to “explain” the discrepancy

RTWT, as they say.

Uh oh, global warming makes sea level rise decelerate? You mean we’re saved?

Auto manufacturers have decided that enough is enough with CAFE standards, and turn on the Obama Adminstration for insisting on impossible emissions standards.

Remember when global warming would cause more forest fires? Yeah, nevermind.

Tom Nelson has advice for those who think Joe Romm might be a credible source of anything more than fresh spittle. If you require further convincing, try this.

Christopher Monckton, coming soon to a MMA Arena near you?

…Monckton had no slides, no graphs, and only part of one hour, and was faced with tough questions from seasoned journalists, 100 stacked seats of activists who hate him, and yet in that time 9% of the people who saw the debate and thought we needed to act on CO2, changed their mind.

He then delivered a roundhouse kick to Australia’s common sense and the Convoy of No Confidence was born:

Convoy number 1. Please put BROWN balloon/streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 2.Please put PINK balloon/streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 3. Please put LIGHT BLUE balloon/streamers to show your convoy.
Brisbane Convoy 4. Please put YELLOW balloon /streamers to show your convoy.
Brisbane Convoy 5. Please put WHITE balloon /streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 6. Please put ORANGE balloon/ streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 7.Please put PURPLE balloon / streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 8.Please put RED balloon/streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 9. Your colour is GREY
Convoy number 10. Please put BLACK balloon/streamers to show your convoy.
Convoy number 11. Please put DARK BLUE balloon / streamers to show your convoy.

Observant readers may notice a color is missing from the list. Heh.

And now, a musical interlude.

..

 Stop the EPA. No, really. Stop them.

You know what carbon credits are like? Tony Soprano, that’s what.

Green on green, Yale scares up some scaremongers to bash President Obama. It’s fun for the whole family.

Oops, don’t you love it when hippies hurry to claim everything dangerous  is caused by global warming and the truth accidentally slips out?

Doctors for the Environment Australia (DEA) receive a tongue-lashing from Paua, and not in the good way.

You can believe what hippies say is happening to the climate, or you can believe what governments prepare for.

You can believe what hippies say we need to do to save Gaia, or you can believe what the smart money is doing:

The UK’s energy market white paper is too vague to encourage green investment – Funding for wind farms slowing down due to low average wind speeds which are depressing rates of return.

It’s the Sun, stupid. NASA says so:

NASA satellite data from the years 2000 through 2011 show the Earth’s atmosphere is allowing far more heat to be released into space than alarmist computer models have predicted, reports a new study in the peer-reviewed science journal Remote Sensing. The study indicates far less future global warming will occur than United Nations computer models have predicted, and supports prior studies indicating increases in atmospheric carbon dioxide trap far less heat than alarmists have claimed.

Greenpeace’s involvement with the IPCC and the Edenhofer excuse. It sounds exciting in an Osterman Weekend way, but isn’t.

How global warming muppet Jim Hanson made lots of money while doing his best to ensure the world went broke.

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Part Four: Global Hottie

There’s a newish movie in which a train blows up. Over and over again.  It’s like Groundhog Day but with TNT and movie science, which is more reliable than climate science, but still junk.  Source Code is okay, but does get bonus points for featuring this week’s global hottie, Michelle Monaghan. It’s her first time on the round-up, be nice.

*click*

Thanks for reading. There will be no round-up next week, it will be back again August 11th.

Virgin Enterprise quits Britain

Richard Branson is moving a sizeable chunk of his Virgin empire to Switzerland to avoid rising costs of doing business in the UK.

Virgin Enterprise, which owns the trademarks and rights to the Virgin brand, is moving to Switzerland and is advertising for staff there. Although it is said to be a relatively small part of the business, Virgin insiders said it would become increasingly significant as the brand was franchised around the world.  A source said the decision had been made to maximise “tax efficiency”. Other Virgin businesses, including Virgin Atlantic and Virgin Media, would continue to be based and pay tax in Britain.

Sir Richard is estimated to be worth more than £3 billion and parts of his personal wealth are reported to be held in offshore tax havens.

There’s no problem with business acting rationally to save paying taxes, except when the business is fronted by a green campaigner.

he thinks we're plane stupid, or something

The cost of doing business in the UK is rising largely because of the soaring price of energy, which in turn is largely due to the unsustainable costs of useless renewable energy.  The same sort of renewable energy that Richard Branson loves enough to invest $400 million in:

The Virgin Green Fund, based in London and San Francisco, will be one of the few private-equity style funds to raise its target amount this year when it reaches its final close in September.  The fund ploughs $5m-$100m into growing renewable energy sectors such as biomass and solar power in the US and western Europe.

The nice thing about being rich and clueless is that when your silly green ideas raise the cost of living above your comfort level, you just up and move to a place where you can keep more of your money. Never mind the poor saps who don’t enjoy that luxury. Sorry about your luck granny, throw another lottery ticket on the fire and you might make it through the winter.

Branson is just the latest rich activist to flee high taxes. Bono and U2 quit Ireland without a backward glance at the revenue hole the move left for their countrymen. It turns out that rich activists are rich first, activists second.

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Fun with a broken CFL

Ecobulbs are a menace, so it’s a good thing that both the US and Canada have seen the light and reversed decisions that would take away our trusty incandescents.

The folks at the Media Research Center have fun with a broken CFL:

..

You can view the EPA’s disposal instructions for a broken CFL here. Or you can do it the Bayonet way.

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Greenwash for sale

Big green loves the green. The color of money, that is, not the pesky environment.

the wwf gets a black eye

Hippies at the World Wildlife Fund let companies use the famous panda bear logo if they sign up for WWF green programs, yet don’t seem to bother checking on the clear-cutter’s after the check has cleared:

Conservation group WWF let timber companies use its panda brand logo while they were razing some of the world’s most biologically rich rainforests or trading in potentially illegally sourced timber, according to the investigative group Global Witness.

The WWF says the 20-year-old scheme is now responsible for nearly 19% of forest products bought or sold internationally, with members’ combined annual sales approaching $70bn (£43bn). However, Global Witness’s report, Pandering to the Loggers, claims Gftn’s membership and participation rules are inadequate, allowing companies to systematically abuse the scheme.

Don’t be surprised. The WWF, like Greenpeace, is only in it for the money, because there’s gold in them thar green hills:

 WWF, which is celebrating its 50th anniversary this year, makes about $500m a year from donations and corporate endorsements but has been criticised by other environment groups and NGOs for its links to forestry, mining, tobacco, banks, palm oil, biofuel and other companies.

The WWF will sell greenwash credentials to anyone, as long as the price is right.

Ethics is hard, greenwash is easy.

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Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, July 21st 2011

Greenpeace demands data, scientists should be conCERNed about events in Europe, and someone tell PETA that live animals are being experimented on for the cause of global warming. That’s some Pay-Per-View hippie on hippie gold just waiting to happen.

*A pre-apology.  Thanks to an unforeseen tech fail caused by global warming coffee, I’m using the worst keyboard in the world and typos may occur. More than usual, I mean.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

Perennial alarmist Sir David King is no stranger to Bayonet readers, but this is his first big win to become Hippie of the Week.  If yo only read the headlines, you might be fooled into thinking that King had a Damascene moment as he called for the Kyoto Protocol to be abandoned. But you’d be wrong.

What King wants is, unbelievably, worse than Kyoto. He wants every country on the planet to limit their CO2 emissions to 2 tonnes per capita per year:

The ultimate aim, he said, should be that by mid-century each country should have an emissions quota based on their population – probably set at around two tonnes of carbon per person – supported by a carbon trading system, by which rich countries wanting to exceed their quota could buy carbon credits from poorer nations.

If you need an idea of what an economy looks like at that level, look at Guyana. No, really. In 2007, Guyana’s CO2 emissions were exactly 2 tonnes per person. Nothing against the good folks of Guyana, but my guess is that they would prefer to live an American lifestyle far more than an American would like to live a Guyanian one.

Sir David and his friend, Mike

King, of course, is known to be an out-there hippie thinker. He’s previously suggested the Iraq war was the world’s first global warming induced resource war and that Climategate was executed by a cabal of hackers in the employ of foreign governments or American right-wingers.

Part Two: Warmists & Alarmists

CERN, the particle people, have completed experiments studying the relationship between cosmic rays and clouds. What they found profoundly affects global warming models, and not in a way that warmists are going to like. Which is why  CERN boffins have been told to shut up and not interpret the findings. What are the odds that a  swarthy fellow appeared in CERN’s offices and whispered, “Nice large hadron collider you got there… be a shame if something happened to it.”

Consensus, it’s what replaced science.

Good news, the UN wants to save the world with green helmet peace keepers. Lock your children away before they arrive. In even better news, the UN says it’ll only cost $38 trillion to make the third world green. Given the UN’s pristine record when it comes to handling megafunds, what could possibly go wrong?

Cognitive dissonance is not the exclusive domain of hippies. How else to explain why the co-founder of Intel, a corporation that consumes copper in quantities that makes your eyes bleed donate to a cause focused on stopping new copper mines:

Big Green Inc. is afflicted with a peculiar schizophrenia that shows most clearly in President Obama’s clean energy economy campaign. “Clean energy economy” sounds so promising — wind farms, solar panels, electric cars, biofuels, wonderful products — all set in a pristine Eden, an untouchable paradise like Bristol Bay. They want all those wonderful products, but they don’t want anybody developing anything to get the stuff necessary to make them. Like mental patients or mystics, from their moral high throne, true believers can’t perceive their own contradictions, can’t grasp the biblical “more bricks, no straw” analogy.

Maybe we’re only supposed to get the pesky raw materials from China, where we can pretend they are magicked from the ground in a pollution-free process powered by green tea and meditation. Or something.

If large predators go extinct, even small species will suffer. Unless it’s Al Gore, then it’ll be fine.

Donna grinds the IPCC for using press clippings even when they claim not to, and has exciting news about her forthcoming book. Some put Raj Pachauri on suicide watch, stat.

It’s the Sun, stupid.

Where’s PETA when you need them? Scientists in Brazil are to expose live animals to dangerous pollutants to see how they fare:

…machines will pump CO2 into closed-off rooms. Each climate-controlled room will stay at temperatures that reflect climate projections from the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. ADAPTA’s researchers will examine how the species adapt over time by performing genetic sequencing on new generations born in these controlled climate-simulating conditions.

Unless PETA knows CO2 isn’t a dangerous pollutant but a trace gas essential to life on Earth, surely they must protest? Crickets, chirping.

The Guardian says Antarctica was once a tropical paradise. No word on if dinosaur soccer mom’s in SUV’s were to blame, or not.

That ‘scientific consensus’ warmists like to pretend means something, was itself manufactured. Awkward.

Add it to The Listcats cause global warming.

take that, Gaia

The EPA goes after the hearts and undeveloped minds of American kids, because adults don’t believe a word they say anymore.

Shut up, they explained. The BBC decides that being unbiased really sucks when it comes to global warming coverage. Rumors that the Beeb is to be renamed the Ministry of Truth are unconfirmed.

Weepy Bill McKibben has a new book out and Grist has (softball) questions:

Q. Well, how do you stay hopeful, or at least engaged? How do you keep people from just curling up into the fetal position?

A. You know what, at some level I’ve given up trying to figure out whether I’m pessimistic or optimistic. I get up in the morning and do what I can, as much as I can, to try and change the odds of this wager that we’ve undertaken. What keeps me hopeful is seeing the tremendous response of people all over the world. We’ve organized 350.org in every country except North Korea…

I’m guessing that last sentence isn’t true, unless I missed the story of Bill weeping in Waziristan.

Green on green action between Andrew Revkin and Tim Flannery:

I was alternately engaged and exasperated by the book, which Flannery casts as a “twin biography of our species and our planet.” …

Whether the result of sloppiness or conscious or subconscious selectivity, the midsection of the book contains repeated patches of interwoven misstatement, fact and hyperbole seemingly aimed at indicting all things manufactured.

Ouch.

The Gristian cult of Gaia seems to believe Earth has an immune system. Um, it’s a planet, dudes.

The irony meter is broken. Greenpeace demands data transparency.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Almost every prediction you here about global warming is the result of a model. But how much trust should we give to models that don’t accurately predict the past?

Fun in the Sub-Continent. India ejected an anti-coal environment minister so they could get on on and build some power stations.

Danish bacon = good. Danish wind power, notsomuch:

…the CEPOS study found that Danish consumers are the ones who take it on the chin. Denmark’s electricity prices are the highest in the entire European Union. And the greenhouse gas reduction benefits? Slim to none, since the exported wind power replaces hydropower, which does not produce significant greenhouse gas emissions. The wind power consumed in Denmark does displace some fossil fuel emissions, but at some cost: $124 per ton, nearly six times the price on the European Trading System.

Fun in Germany. Greens celebrated when germany announced it was to axe its nuclear program, but it’s all gone downhill since then:

Germany has announced a most audacious energy policy:  in order to shutter nuclear plants (but not completely scuttle their economy), the German government will direct climate fund cash to building coal and natural gas plants

Hippies, they never see it coming.

A tale of two economies. At the NYT, the green economy is fine, but needs a ‘push’, at Investors.com the green economy is withering.

A low-down dirty denier says that there’s been no significant impact from global warming. Oh, wait, that was an IPCC lead author? My bad.

It’s the volcanoes, stupid:

Busted. Antarctic researchers are barbecuing penguins near a temperature measuring station. How else to explain a +63°C anomaly? Unless…

..

 Tim Flannery (of the Revkin bunfight) told Oz politicos that because of global warming it would never rain again and to build a hugely expensive desalination plant. So they did, and then it rained. A lot. And now it costs half a milion dollars a day to keep the desalination plant idle.

British ‘luvvies‘ are upset that the British Council is axing a program to promote global warming. It’s all good fun until someone takes other people’s money away.

The inconvenient truth about wind turbines. Video at the link. You should also bookmark the Aardvark. Hey, that rhymes.

Pesky planet not warming for 15 years, how is a hard-working warmist supposed to put organic food on the unvarnished, sustainable-forestry-product table for his Gaia-conscious one-child family?

One third of the planet’s oceans haven’t warmed since Molly Ringwald’s career began? Can that be right?

Oh noes, the effects of a trace gas on global warming have been overstated?

Tom Nelson takes a hatchet to the WWF’s latest attempts to fund themselves by using polar bear sympathy.

Solar cars, what could possibly go wrong?

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Part Four: Global Hottie

A quiet email to The Daily Bayonet suggested Miranda Kerr would be a suitable global hottie this week. After extensive research, we agree. Ms. Kerr appears to be a perfect candidate for global hottie, even if she is married to a homicidal elf (Image at the link is for the ladies. You’re welcome.)

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, July 21st 2011

Greenpeace demands data, scientists should be conCERNed about events in Europe, and someone tell PETA that live animals are being experimented on for the cause of global warming. That’s some Pay-Per-View hippie on hippie gold just waiting to happen.

*A pre-apology.  Thanks to an unforeseen tech fail caused by global warming coffee, I’m using the worst keyboard in the world and typos may occur. More than usual, I mean.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

Perennial alarmist Sir David King is no stranger to Bayonet readers, but this is his first big win to become Hippie of the Week.  If yo only read the headlines, you might be fooled into thinking that King had a Damascene moment as he called for the Kyoto Protocol to be abandoned. But you’d be wrong.

What King wants is, unbelievably, worse than Kyoto. He wants every country on the planet to limit their CO2 emissions to 2 tonnes per capita per year:

The ultimate aim, he said, should be that by mid-century each country should have an emissions quota based on their population – probably set at around two tonnes of carbon per person – supported by a carbon trading system, by which rich countries wanting to exceed their quota could buy carbon credits from poorer nations.

If you need an idea of what an economy looks like at that level, look at Guyana. No, really. In 2007, Guyana’s CO2 emissions were exactly 2 tonnes per person. Nothing against the good folks of Guyana, but my guess is that they would prefer to live an American lifestyle far more than an American would like to live a Guyanian one.

Sir David and his friend, Mike

King, of course, is known to be an out-there hippie thinker. He’s previously suggested the Iraq war was the world’s first global warming induced resource war and that Climategate was executed by a cabal of hackers in the employ of foreign governments or American right-wingers.

Part Two: Warmists & Alarmists

CERN, the particle people, have completed experiments studying the relationship between cosmic rays and clouds. What they found profoundly affects global warming models, and not in a way that warmists are going to like. Which is why  CERN boffins have been told to shut up and not interpret the findings. What are the odds that a  swarthy fellow appeared in CERN’s offices and whispered, “Nice large hadron collider you got there… be a shame if something happened to it.”

Consensus, it’s what replaced science.

Good news, the UN wants to save the world with green helmet peace keepers. Lock your children away before they arrive. In even better news, the UN says it’ll only cost $38 trillion to make the third world green. Given the UN’s pristine record when it comes to handling megafunds, what could possibly go wrong?

Cognitive dissonance is not the exclusive domain of hippies. How else to explain why the co-founder of Intel, a corporation that consumes copper in quantities that makes your eyes bleed donate to a cause focused on stopping new copper mines:

Big Green Inc. is afflicted with a peculiar schizophrenia that shows most clearly in President Obama’s clean energy economy campaign. “Clean energy economy” sounds so promising — wind farms, solar panels, electric cars, biofuels, wonderful products — all set in a pristine Eden, an untouchable paradise like Bristol Bay. They want all those wonderful products, but they don’t want anybody developing anything to get the stuff necessary to make them. Like mental patients or mystics, from their moral high throne, true believers can’t perceive their own contradictions, can’t grasp the biblical “more bricks, no straw” analogy.

Maybe we’re only supposed to get the pesky raw materials from China, where we can pretend they are magicked from the ground in a pollution-free process powered by green tea and meditation. Or something.

If large predators go extinct, even small species will suffer. Unless it’s Al Gore, then it’ll be fine.

Donna grinds the IPCC for using press clippings even when they claim not to, and has exciting news about her forthcoming book. Some put Raj Pachauri on suicide watch, stat.

It’s the Sun, stupid.

Where’s PETA when you need them? Scientists in Brazil are to expose live animals to dangerous pollutants to see how they fare:

…machines will pump CO2 into closed-off rooms. Each climate-controlled room will stay at temperatures that reflect climate projections from the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. ADAPTA’s researchers will examine how the species adapt over time by performing genetic sequencing on new generations born in these controlled climate-simulating conditions.

Unless PETA knows CO2 isn’t a dangerous pollutant but a trace gas essential to life on Earth, surely they must protest? Crickets, chirping.

The Guardian says Antarctica was once a tropical paradise. No word on if dinosaur soccer mom’s in SUV’s were to blame, or not.

That ‘scientific consensus’ warmists like to pretend means something, was itself manufactured. Awkward.

Add it to The Listcats cause global warming.

take that, Gaia

The EPA goes after the hearts and undeveloped minds of American kids, because adults don’t believe a word they say anymore.

Shut up, they explained. The BBC decides that being unbiased really sucks when it comes to global warming coverage. Rumors that the Beeb is to be renamed the Ministry of Truth are unconfirmed.

Weepy Bill McKibben has a new book out and Grist has (softball) questions:

Q. Well, how do you stay hopeful, or at least engaged? How do you keep people from just curling up into the fetal position?

A. You know what, at some level I’ve given up trying to figure out whether I’m pessimistic or optimistic. I get up in the morning and do what I can, as much as I can, to try and change the odds of this wager that we’ve undertaken. What keeps me hopeful is seeing the tremendous response of people all over the world. We’ve organized 350.org in every country except North Korea…

I’m guessing that last sentence isn’t true, unless I missed the story of Bill weeping in Waziristan.

Green on green action between Andrew Revkin and Tim Flannery:

I was alternately engaged and exasperated by the book, which Flannery casts as a “twin biography of our species and our planet.” …

Whether the result of sloppiness or conscious or subconscious selectivity, the midsection of the book contains repeated patches of interwoven misstatement, fact and hyperbole seemingly aimed at indicting all things manufactured.

Ouch.

The Gristian cult of Gaia seems to believe Earth has an immune system. Um, it’s a planet, dudes.

The irony meter is broken. Greenpeace demands data transparency.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Almost every prediction you here about global warming is the result of a model. But how much trust should we give to models that don’t accurately predict the past?

Fun in the Sub-Continent. India ejected an anti-coal environment minister so they could get on on and build some power stations.

Danish bacon = good. Danish wind power, notsomuch:

…the CEPOS study found that Danish consumers are the ones who take it on the chin. Denmark’s electricity prices are the highest in the entire European Union. And the greenhouse gas reduction benefits? Slim to none, since the exported wind power replaces hydropower, which does not produce significant greenhouse gas emissions. The wind power consumed in Denmark does displace some fossil fuel emissions, but at some cost: $124 per ton, nearly six times the price on the European Trading System.

Fun in Germany. Greens celebrated when germany announced it was to axe its nuclear program, but it’s all gone downhill since then:

Germany has announced a most audacious energy policy:  in order to shutter nuclear plants (but not completely scuttle their economy), the German government will direct climate fund cash to building coal and natural gas plants

Hippies, they never see it coming.

A tale of two economies. At the NYT, the green economy is fine, but needs a ‘push’, at Investors.com the green economy is withering.

A low-down dirty denier says that there’s been no significant impact from global warming. Oh, wait, that was an IPCC lead author? My bad.

It’s the volcanoes, stupid:

Busted. Antarctic researchers are barbecuing penguins near a temperature measuring station. How else to explain a +63°C anomaly? Unless…

..

 Tim Flannery (of the Revkin bunfight) told Oz politicos that because of global warming it would never rain again and to build a hugely expensive desalination plant. So they did, and then it rained. A lot. And now it costs half a milion dollars a day to keep the desalination plant idle.

British ‘luvvies‘ are upset that the British Council is axing a program to promote global warming. It’s all good fun until someone takes other people’s money away.

The inconvenient truth about wind turbines. Video at the link. You should also bookmark the Aardvark. Hey, that rhymes.

Pesky planet not warming for 15 years, how is a hard-working warmist supposed to put organic food on the unvarnished, sustainable-forestry-product table for his Gaia-conscious one-child family?

One third of the planet’s oceans haven’t warmed since Molly Ringwald’s career began? Can that be right?

Oh noes, the effects of a trace gas on global warming have been overstated?

Tom Nelson takes a hatchet to the WWF’s latest attempts to fund themselves by using polar bear sympathy.

Solar cars, what could possibly go wrong?

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Part Four: Global Hottie

A quiet email to The Daily Bayonet suggested Miranda Kerr would be a suitable global hottie this week. After extensive research, we agree. Ms. Kerr appears to be a perfect candidate for global hottie, even if she is married to a homicidal elf (Image at the link is for the ladies. You’re welcome.)

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Thanks for reading.

Greenpeace strikes again

Under-educated gap-year hippies at Greenpeace have destroyed experimental crops in Australia:

In the early hours of July 14, Greenpeace protestors gained illegal entry into an experimental CSIRO operated farm near Canberra and destroyed a crop of genetically modified (GM) wheat.

Greenpeace is citing fears that GM wheat crops are unsafe for human consumption and could spread unabated, contaminating Australia’s bulk wheat supply, as the reason for their action. The protestors created what the organisation calls “a decontamination area” to dispose of the crops.

Greenpeace has a long an history of opposing GM crops, even going so far as to persuade a starving Zambia to reject GM food aid:

Britain’s pressure groups have had a hotline to the Zambian scientists entrusted with advising their government about GM relief maize. The Zambians have instinctively accepted their suspicion of the motives of the United States in flooding Africa with GM food – and they have been particularly moved by the health fears that erupted in Britain in 1999 [Fears in no small part fueled by Greenpeace – Ed]

Greenpeace has told Zambia that its burgeoning business selling organic produce to Europe could collapse if it accepts GM. The EU has denied this but Zambia decided to believe the NGOs.

The shamed ecoterrorists have since greenwashed the record to fudge their involvement in Zambia, but the ugly truth is they preferred people to starve than eat the ‘wrong sort’ of grain. It’s nothing new, Greens lead the way when it comes to increasing the body count in Africa.

Radical greens believe the planet needs fewer people, and where better to start than the world’s most vulnerable populations.

Greenpeace destroyed the crops in Australia not because of a irrational fear of science, but because the last thing they want is a world that can feed itself.

It’s not a bug, it’s a feature. To be green is to be a misanthrope. Gaia über alles, or something.

 

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Power and Light

A post of two parts, in which there is good news and bad news.

First, the good news.

Light

North America has seen the light, and it is incandescent.

First, Canada issued a stay of execution for the much-maligned incandescent light bulbs. This is simply a stepping-stone on the return journey to business-as-usual pick your own light bulbs life as we know it.

Now, after a wobble, the US House of Representatives has blocked their own incandescent ban*. The only remaining question is whether or not the Democrat-controlled Senate will pass the measure.

smug lamp is smug

*Yes, I know that technically it was not a ban, just a set of rules which made incandescents obsolete. You say tomato, I say shut it you stinkin’ pedantic hippies.

Now the not so good news…

Power

One of the reasons North Americans will get to light their homes in the manner of their choice and Britons won’t is because the populations of Canada and the US made a fuss about government taking a step too far into their daily life. Not so in Britain, where the population has become not just reliant on big huge government, but has become dependent:

The Open Public Services White Paper is potentially one of the most important documents produced by any recent government, because it presages a fundamental shift in power, from the state to the people. The big question is whether this will ever happen – not just because central government relinquishes its grip with the greatest reluctance, but also because it is by no means clear that the country wishes to be entrusted with such freedom, or knows any more what to do with it.

This, then, is the Big Idea for the current parliament and beyond – giving people control once more over their lives. As Mr Letwin told MPs: “There could not be a more important issue than this.” But are we ready for it? Have we not proxied out to the state so many things that we used to do ourselves that no one either knows what to do any more or wants to shoulder the responsibility?

The notion that a nation may no longer desire freedom because it’s hard is a terrifying prospect.

No wonder Britain is the land of wind farms and EU compliance, the people have either given up or their spirit has been crushed under the heavy boot of big government.

For Big Green, a somnolent populace is just what they need. Chris Huhne gets to play the fool with the nation’s energy policy, yet even as utility bills soar and the insanity is on full display for anyone caring to look behind the curtain, Britons give a shrug and figure ‘someone’ should do something about it.

Somewhere, George Orwell is weeping.

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Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, July 14th 2011

Science is hard for hippies, Skippy’s coming to dinner and Manbearpig returns to our dimension for a day.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

He’s back! Climate prophet profiteer Al Gore is storming back into the public domain with a vengeance. And right on schedule too. It was three years ago he launched his $300 million ‘We’ campaign, which he said would last… three years. Al got so much value from his $300 million that now he’s back to make all the same arguments he did three years ago:

..

 You’ll note that Al is focused on ‘Big Oil and Big Coal’ money, yet we still don’t know where his $300 million came from. But that’s different, because it’s Big Green, and green is good.  Because Al says it is. So SHUT UP.

Gore has announced that September 14th will be 24 hours of “reality”.  It’s unclear in which dimension Al exists for the other 364 days of the year, I don’t know about you, but reality seems to be a daily exercise around Chez Bayonet. No matter, the being we know as Al Gore, or manbearpig if you prefer, is to reveal the deniers mid-September. If you can’t wait for the big moment, a quick look at the blogroll might reveal a few ‘deniers’.   Jeez Al, it ain’t rocket science.

he can see reality from his house

Anyway, for his personal hypocrisy, his endless hubris and his lifetime achievement of generating profits for ad agencies, Al Gore is Hippie of the Week.  But he’s still not getting his own section of the round-up back. Unless Big Green wants to, you know, grease the wheel a bit.

Part Two: Warmists & Alarmists

David ‘Jail’em’ Suzuki wants to stop paying attention to deniers. He says so in a column entirely devoted to the subject. According to Dave, if a scientist ever accepted a free mug from a gas station, his research is to be tossed aside as egregiously tainted.  Unless it agrees with the hippie agenda, then it’s all good.

Think Progress figures that bitter-clingers who deny climate change had it coming when it comes to natural disasters.   We’ve seen this ugly argument at TP before. Brad Johnson, who penned both columns, apparently believes in a vengeful Gaia who is both upset and carrying an electoral map of the USA. Deranged much, Brad?

Donna Laframboise and Judith Curry separately dismember the IPCC. Donna takes on Trenberth and Pachauri while Curry figures the IPCC is fatally flawed with the leadership at the very top.  And when poor old Raj is down and reeling, Donna nukes him from orbit, just to be sure.

Fun with fundraising. Hippies and Democrats (but I repeat myself) have enjoyed using the Koch Brothers as a pinata whenever they need to insert a bogeyman into the energy debate. So imagine the Koch Brothers surprise when the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee wrote and asked for donations:

…you can imagine my chagrin when I got a letter from you on June 17 asking us to make five-figure contributions to the DSCC. You followed that up with a voicemail* indicating that, if we contributed heavily enough, we would garner an invitation to join you and other Democratic leaders at a retreat in Kiawah Island this September.

I’m hoping you can help me understand the intent of your request because it’s hard not to conclude that DSCC politics have become so cynical that you actually expect people whom you routinely denounce to give DSCC money.

The new Aussie carbon tax is just the latest sign that our antipodean friends are a few hot dogs shy of a full barbie. First they want to cull camels who fart, now they want to eat kangaroos? You want fries with that Skippy?

..

It’s like Lassie, but with a ‘roo. Bless ’em.

Proving that you can prove anything with the right study, an ‘environmental’ group says that more printing and paper is good for global warming.

Follow the money. Taxpayers fund the EPA. The EPA funds green groups. Green groups sue the EPA to make it regulate more often. So it does.

EDF economist wants ‘deniers’ on the record. Maybe he’s prepping for the climate Nurenburg?

Nature notes that Michael ‘Stick’ Mann is tired of skeptics having fun at his expense (PDF):

Mann has grown weary of dealing with the various groups that are criticizing him. “In reality, these groups are guilty over and over
again of defamation, slander and libel, but that is far more difficult to fight legally,” Mann says. “Even if you were to prevail, you would have invested potentially several years of your career, and frankly those of us who love doing science are not willing to do that.”

Climate scientists, ‘doing science’ science the way Debbie did Dallas.

There’s something wrong with hippies. When most people see a classroom full of moppets, they want to teach them or encourage them. Hippies want to indoctrinate them, or blow them to pieces. And if that fails, how about stuffing them into eco-buildings that any animal rights-activist would recognize as being unfit for chickens?

Weepy Bill McKibben is arranging “the biggest civil disobedience protest in the history of the North American climate movement” to take place outside the White House in late August. Bill is like the little kid with his nose stuck to the window of the cool kids party. No matter how much he tries, they just won’t let him in.

The UK’s John Beddington doesn’t want any crisis to go to waste:

The onset of more severe climate impacts overseas may also open up temporary opportunities, or ‘policy windows’. These would allow legislators the licence to take specific bold actions which they ordinarily believe would not otherwise be possible or politically acceptable…

In other words, he thinks you’re stupid.

Science is hard, which is why we must trust those clever greens to help us. Okay, maybe not the guy who claimed to be surrounded by penguins in the Arctic.

Oh noes, Canadian Caribou are on the road to extinction. It’s deforestation and habitat invasion to blame, unless that argument doesn’t work, in which case you know it’s coming.  One thought, why don’t we find this ‘road to extinction’ and close it? I know, it’s genius, right?

Harold Camping and global warmists, two sides of the same doom-mongering coin.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

The UK’s Met. Office proves the old adage that even a blind squirrel can find a nut once in a while and figures out that it really is the Sun, stupid.

“We now believe that [the solar cycle] accounts for 50 per cent of the variability from year to year,” says Scaife. With solar physicists predicting a long-term reduction in the intensity of the solar cycle – and possibly its complete disappearance for a few decades, as happened during the so-called Maunder Minimum from 1645 to 1715 – this could be an ominous signal for icy winters ahead, despite global warming.

She’s back. Paua, once a popular contributor here at The Daily Bayonet, is back from her blogging hiatus.  She’s posting up a storm, so go visit, tell her I sent you, and bookmark the snark. In case you forgot, this is Paua’s self portrait:

the reason Australia needs a carbon tax

Warmists often use ‘scientific consensus’ as an argument to prop up the global warming house of cards. But the notion that scientific consensus means anything is specious, at best.

The IPCC is a train wreck in slo-mo. Which is good for traffic, frankly.

Clean tech, green tech. Tomato, potato. It’s all about to come crashing down:

Clean energy is still much more expensive and less reliable than coal or gas, and in an era of heightened budget austerity the subsidies required to make clean energy artificially cheaper are becoming unsustainable.

Science is hard. Gavin Schmidt, who works for NASA but isn’t a rocket scientist, suggested Lake Powell was doomed by global warming when he featured it on the cover of his book.  Seventy feet of rising water later, Lake Powell 1, Gavin 0.

The US military should be unconcerned with its carbon emissions and concentrate on how many different ways it can deliver high-velocity lead poisoning, or something.

It’s a good job Al Gore is coming back, US belief in global warming is down 27% in four years. Take that, hippies.

Hippies never get predictions right, which is why they quietly move the goalposts. The Guardian reports the Arctic may be ice-free as soon as 30-years from now. But wait, wasn’t the Arctic supposed to be sea ice free next year?  Why yes, yes it was:

The pesky sea temperature refuses to legitimize the basic theory behind man-made global warming. Joe Bastardi also has questions about the relationship between CO2 and temperature:

…here is the crux of my whole argument. I believe temps, because of the changes in the oceanic, solar and volcanic cycles, are starting a trend downward. The other side – and these temps are below the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change values – has some explaining to do inasmuch as, according to them, these temps were not supposed to stall like this, due to the rise in CO2. In fact, there was worry back at the turn of the century that we were fast approaching a “tipping point” of no return. At the very least, this has been delayed (and I think I will be proven correct — that it will be denied and temps will go the other way).

But before the other side blows a gasket screaming “selective verification,” let me say, they were the ones who said we were at the tipping point 10 years ago, not me.

Ouch.

Philippine authorities have a question for couples wishing to wed: Got Wood?  No, really.

Shale gas is such a big opportunity that not even Big Green and Russia combined can stop it.

Volcanic activity’s effect on global temperature may have been greatly underestimated.  Go figure that a scientific ‘discipline’ reliant upon proving a trace gas esssential to life on Earth is responsible for driving temperatures would underestimate something like volcanoes or the Sun?

British households are to pay a lot more for their energy, but the Minister of Silly Walks Climate Change says it’s high bills or blackouts. Apparently he thinks this isn’t a reflection on his idiot policies but a compelling argument to SHUT UP.

Remember when the warmists used the Russian heat wave as proof of global warming? It was weather. So much for climate experts and Brad Johnson’s belief in them.

The US House of Representatives failed to repeal the ban on incandescent light bulbs. Canadian border towns should be stocking up.

An onconvenient study showed that the smarter you are, the less inclined you are to believe the global warming crowd. That’s hardly news to an erudiet eruitide eritude clever person like you, but hippies are upset. Or they will be as soon as Joe Romm tells them what to think.

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Part Four: Global Hottie

This week’s hottie is a last-minute replacement. Mila Kunis was lined up for the slot until her scheduling conflict wrecked the feel-good story of the week. We hope Ms. Kunis will find a way to make good on her promise, but for now we’ll turn to the shapely Brit who put the vamp in vampire, Kate Beckinsale. Because, well, because. SHUT UP.

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Thanks for reading.