Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Mar. 31st 2011

Hippie of the week is a skeptic’s best friend, flatulence is a warming topic and activists in California get the band back together to ensure the Golden State has no future.

Oh, and we’re kickin’ it old school for the hottie.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

Grab your Sheilas and tinnies and toss another dwarf on the barbie – we’re heading down under to congratulate hippie of the week Tim Flannery.

Some quick context for why Tim’s the big winner – Aussie PM Julia Gillard promised voters there would be no carbon tax under her government.  And she meant every word, right up until she needed the support of Green Bob Brown to form a government and decided a carbon tax sounded just dandy.  Naturally enough, Aussies felt a little hard done by at this brazen u-turn and Julia needed some ‘science’ cover, fast.  Enter Tim Flannery, whom PM Gillard appointed Australian Climate Commissioner.

an artist's impression of Tim Flannery. the artist was fired

So far, so much politics.  But then Flannery gave an interview with Andrew Bolt and said this:

 

I just need to clarfy in terms of the climate context for you. If we cut emissions today, global temperatures are not likely to drop for about a thousand years.

That hissing sound you hear is the air rushing out of Gillard’s arguments that a carbon tax is needed to save the planet.  Or it may be the sound of her political career doing a Dion.  The writing is on the wall for Aussie’s current government and when they are obliterated at the next election, Tim Flannery won’t be able to buy a beer anywhere in Oz.

Onya, Tim.

Part Two: Warmists & Scaremongers

Hippie organizations are rallying around the beleagured EPA, desperately trying to protect their gravy train last hope of clean air.  Did you know Republicans want to poison babies?  They eat kittens for breakfast too.  Cute ones.

Miners meet hippies as they try to occupy a Scottish mine.  Hippies lose.  Badly.

Hippies hate civilization.  And soap, but that’s almost the same thing.  Caruba outs the anti-energy hippie cult.

Religious folk believe global warming is the cause of natural disasters, not God.  None of the people surveyed were named Noah, apparently.

In some worlds the UN IPCC is a body of scientists respected for their work on climate change.  In Donna Laframboise’s world the UN IPCC is a frog on a dissection board.  No, really:

…certain names pop up again and again in IPCC reports. If shadowy interests were trying to “control the message” in these documents, entrusting key tasks to a small group of people might be an effective strategy.

She names names, you should RTWT.

Alberta students create their own electricity from pedal power. They get great light from a CFL, but can’t operate the griddle.  Next week – the tragic story of an epileptic student who starved to death.

Breaking up is hard to do.  Joltin’ Joe Romm no longers hearts Obama,

The WWF considered not having Earth Hour in Japan, but then went ahead anyway after hundreds of thousands of people went to all the trouble of losing everything.

America is fighting three hot wars, Japan is devastated and Kirstie Alley is back on TV, but none of these horrifying events bother hippies.  They’re too concerned about how many times you are allowed to fart before Gaia keels over.

Dancing with the Stars, sponsored by Chiropractors of America

Al Gore, the incredible shrinking guru, was wrong about sea level rise.  Say it ain’t so.

The Catlin team hasn’t needed rescuing yet, but they have noticed the weather near the pole is very cold.  Nature is holding the front page.

Pop quiz – do you wear underwear?  If yes, you’re a climate criminal.  If no, um, keep that to yourself.

The Natural Resources Defense Council held a charity auction fund-raiser in New York.  One of the top prizes was the chance to win a flight with Harrison Ford in his private plane.  Face, meet palm.

Some hard truths for hippies that love to anthropomorphize Gaia:

The environmentalist’s unnatural love affair with nature would be no more intrusive or offensive than the nut job’s love affair with a rock. The difference is that the environmentalist relentlessly coerces everyone into his indulgent fantasy — a grim world predicated on privation and scarcity.  To the environmentalist’s mind, nature is like a female mammalian: she can give only so much before the teat runs dry.

Good grief.  Grist wants us to embrace ‘queer ecology.‘  Stand aside for climate pianist Elton John, or something.

NASA is worried about the Amazon.  Apparently it’s dry, which is bad news for global warming.  We’d have more information to assess their findings if they hadn’t blown up Glory on launch.  Pull up your socks NASA, it’s not like this is rocket sci.. oh, nevermind.

A German has a master plan for society.  What could possibly go wrong?

Simon has found the dumbest place in Oz.  Congratulations, Fremantle, The Daily Bayonet has awarded you a special trophy, simply send $1,000 for shipping and it’s yours.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Everyone likes a good poll dance – Rasmussen says Americans have a fevah and the only cure is more bird shredders, but Gallup says Americans don’t give a hoot about global warming.  Pesky public, perpetrating poll perfidy to perplex the people.

Nissan Leaf owners have another reason to doubt their sanity- the resale value is… zero.  Their only hope is that sales remain stalled, they may be able to sell their EV as a collector’s item or curiosity.  Believe it or not, Leaf owners, it could be worse – you could have bought a Prius plug-in.

America has the most fossil fuel reserves in the world, they’re just not allowed to use them.

California’s ex-Governor Schwarzenegger said San Francisco would drown unless global warming laws were passed, and he was right:

According to the San Jose Mercury News the California Drought will be officially over when Governor Jerry Brown announces it tomorrow.  We have areas in the Sierras that have over 50 feet of snow and the reservoirs are filling up fast with a total group average of 115% of normal and the snow-melt hasn’t even started yet.

Oh noes, the public is bored with global warming.

Mighty Borepatch bringeth the snark to the sad state of UK science.

Climate models, the basis for retooling the global economy back to the stone-age, suck at predicting ocean temperature.

Tom Nelson, #winning:

Two three-minute official Earth Hour videos are below.  The 2010 video is all about the global warming hoax.  The 2011 video fails to even mention the global warming hoax. Make no mistake: this is what winning looks like.  Of course, most alarmists are never going to come right out and admit that on The Most Important Issue of All Time, they were wrong and we were right.  What they’re going to do is just gradually quit talking about it.

Evergreen alarmist Weepy Bill McKibben will say just about anything to frighten folks into believing global warming is all bad, including that it is bad for crops.  Yeah, notsomuch, actually.  More good news for plants we like to eat here.

this image may have been cropped

A carbon accounting modeler says global warming is a scam:

… in science empirical evidence always trumps theory, no matter how much you are in love with the theory. If theory and evidence disagree, real scientists scrap the theory. But official climate science ignored the crucial weather balloon evidence, and other subsequent evidence that backs it up, and instead clung to their carbon dioxide theory — that just happens to keep them in well-paying jobs with lavish research grants, and gives great political power to their government masters.

Try to get past the irony of a ‘carbon accounting modeler’ picking on climate scientists for wanting well-paid jobs based on junk science.  If you can.

Plastic bags are innocent.  In fact, they are better for Gaia than hippie alternatives.

Watts Up With That comments on The Daily Bayonet:

Congratulations on being added to the WUWT blogroll.  Skewer on…

Not only is Anthony Watts a wise, discerning man of great taste, he has some mighty fine commenters as well (h/t reader Kevin):

So you see, the leading environmentalists do not want clean energy. They want the de-industrialisation of the developed world, the population of the world reduced from its current 6.8 billion people down to between 100 million and 500 million people who will live like stone age cavemen, apart from a chosen few who will get to serve the elite as their slaves.

RTWT.

Good news, as Antarctica ice breaks up, the ocean absorbs more CO2.  Hippies are likely to be upset that ungrateful Gaia gets along just fine without them.

A long, fun list of things both caused and not caused by global warming, as claimed by global warmists. It’s like The List 2.0.

Uh oh, hippie opposition to nuclear energy causes more global warming.  Why do they hate the planet so?

Part Four: AGW in the News

Nestlé’s Chairman spoke out about how biofuels cause starvation:

Peter Brabeck-Letmathe, the chairman of Nestlé, lashed out at the Obama administration for promoting the use of ethanol made from corn, at the expense of hundreds of millions of people struggling to afford everyday basics made from the crop.

Even the Guardian has had enough of ethanol.  What they all overlook is that killing poor people isn’t a bug in environmentalism, it’s a feature.

The UK is to turn off streetlights on motorways to save carbon emissions.  What could possibly go wrong?

Californians can rejoice that the folks who ensured Prop. 23 was defeated are banding back together to make sure the global warming laws are enforced:

“Clean energy creates jobs and investment, and that’s exactly what we need to help turn our economy around,” Mr. Brown said in a statement. “Californians for Clean Energy and Jobs will be a strong voice to ensure that California leads the nation in sustainable energy technology.”

Next week – news of a house building boom in Texas.

Carbon taxes are toxic to voters, even if CO2 isn’t.  Julia Gillard was given a peek into her future in the NSW elections.

Hippies hate pretty butterflies and rare birds.  There’s no other purpose for building giant fans, is there?  Unless you want to deafen people, that is.

Let’s see the greens square this circle – they oppose new clean nuclear energy plants, and have used the Japanese problems to escalate fears.  But electric vehicle owners don’t want to buy cars that are fuelled by fossil fuels:

If the events unfolding in Japan lead governments to question the safety and viability of nuclear power, then new plants will be slow to come online. If car buyers know that their EV is likely burning the same CO2-emitting fossil fuels as their neighbor’s internal combustion engine, what’s the point of paying more for something that’s just as dirty, more expensive and not as easy to fuel up?

It’s not the crime, but the cover-up that kills you.  A lesson that Aussie dam operators seem about to learn.  Inventing data is usually no problem (for climate scientists) but not such a great idea if it’s just to hide the fact you may have exacerbated the flooding in Queensland.

The EU calls for cars to be banned from city centers.  Maybe we should all get back on horses… or maybe not.

Louise Gray says Antarctica is going green, but apparently not in the good way.

Forbes looks at the promise of the green energy economy and wonders why we’d want to go back to the 13th century.

What rhymes with NIMBY?  Hippie!  Sort of, if you squint a little:

“Often, many of the same groups urging us to think globally about renewable energy are acting locally to stop the very same renewable energy projects that could create jobs and reduce greenhouse gas emissions”

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Part Five: Global Hottie

This week we go back in time to the long-forgotten 90’s to find our hottie.  Her most recent infamous role was as star of the Splattergate ‘No Pressure’ movie.  Things have been tough for global hottie Gillian Anderson since then, it sounds like she can’t land any decent parts.  That’s not say she doesn’t have good parts, of course.

"I'd click it" - Fox Mulder

Thanks for reading.

Ontario’s eco-fee hangover

Last summer Ontario’s Liberal government delivered consumers a new green stealth tax, on the same day they launched the unpopular HST.

But they were caught out by the  instant consumer backlash.  The new taxes were called ‘eco-fees’ and the government first suspended them, then axed them altogether.  Environment Minister John Gerretsen lost his job over the mess.

Good news for consumers and tax-payers, right?  Wrong.

The organization responsible for managing eco-fees, Stewardship Ontario, is unhappy the government left them swinging in the breeze as soon as voters balked at the new tax and has presented the Ontario Government with an $18 million claim for expenses:

The bill from Stewardship Ontario to taxpayers includes a charge of $8 to $10 million for research and development of the programs; legal fees; marketing campaigns, and the purchase of a $3 million computer system designed to track an array of household hazardous waste materials through the recycling process.

A separate fee of $8.6 million covers the payments that Stewardship Ontario made to the municipalities that collected recycled materials since the cancellation. The ministry asked Stewardship Ontario to continue managing the collection — now paid by government dollars — until it finds a replacement program.

You could argue the $8.6 million is for services rendered, but why are taxpayers being asked to reimburse an industry-funded group up to $10 million for losses made after a green-washing scam was scrapped?

If this sort of thing sounds familiar to Ontario citizens, it should.  Just last month consumers were told they’d have to endure price increases on energy to cover fines levied against utilities found guilty of usury.

Even when Ontario consumers win, they lose.

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Gassing up Antarctica

Russian scientists attempted to drill a hole 3750 metres deep to reach ice-covered Lake Vostok, but failed to make their target by less than 30m when conditions made continuing too dangerous.

So what did they do?

Russian scientists announced that the expedition had to be stopped short because of the encroaching winter. However, the drilling team didn’t want to lose the progress that they’d made—they were just 29.53 m short of their goal—and so dumped kerosene down the 3720-m-long borehole to prevent it from freezing.

The casual dumping of fuel into a 2-mile deep hole in the ice has upset a few people:

Other scientists now worry that the purity of the lake has been ruined, and that the unique ecosystem that lies beneath the ice could be irreversibly damaged.

It’s not like Lake Vostok was that important, it only provides a peek into 400,000 years of temperature and CO2 data.  Scientists still disagree about what the data shows, which makes the Russian decision to pour fossil fuels into the area seem a little, well, insensitive.

image from atlasobscura.netdna-cdn.com

Wait, did I mention the Russkies did it before?

In a 2007 Russian drilling attempt, when a drill bit broke off, scientists poured anti-freeze into the hole. That expedition was abandoned completely.

Climate scientists – caring for the environment so we don’t have to.  Or something.

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Lazy Sunday

Tweets from the week, a hottie to brighten the weekend and a tune.

Because today is Sunday, the F1 season has begun and global warming will still be there tomorrow.

Some Tweets

Hippies invade a Scottish coal mine, meet miners & sing kumbaya. Oh wait, that’s not what happened: http://bit.ly/ha3kXs

oh noes, old hippiemobiles to be worth nothing | Nissan Leaf: Resale value zero because batteries die in 6-8 yrs: http://bit.ly/dUJzTj

Planning to sit in the dark tomorrow? Why? | Earth Hour – a dissent: http://bit.ly/eGdcyp

The UK heads back to the dark ages. No, really | Motorway lights to be turned off to cut carbon – Telegraph: http://bit.ly/eImCAj

Uh oh. Wind & solar not cost competitive for another 20 yrs, says evil denier… Stephen Chu: http://bit.ly/ewrYxA

SHUT UP, they explained… Activist group take on Jones over climate | Courier Mail: http://bit.ly/exRBSY

A hippie blames global warming in 3..2… Polar bear Knut died of brain damage: http://bbc.in/hBV70G

Oh noes, penguins lubed by wrecked ship transporting hippie-friendly soya beans. Morgan Freeman hardest hit? http://bit.ly/gw3dMk

Giant bird shredders are picky eaters – prefer exotic avians | Wind Farms Trump House Cats – NYTimes.com: http://bit.ly/fkWWez

Follow me on Twitter, click the birdie in the top left sidebar.

A Hottie

Formula One has started, but there are no female drivers in that series… which means it’s Danica Patrick time.

You’re welcome.

A Song

Aimee Mann is a guilty pleasure, so let’s feature her anthem to hippies distraught at the brutal regularity of the weekly round-up.

 

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The Earth Hour of Power

This Saturday night between 8.30 and 9.30pm local time, earnest hippies, browbeaten parents and other folks of conscience will turn off all their lights, sit round a candle and believe they are saving the planet.  Or at least appearing to save the planet, which is the same thing to a hippie.

Then, at 9.30 they’ll give up on attempts to roast a marshmallow over a candle and fire up everything in the house again.  The power companies understand this stunt, which means that lots of spinning capacity will be ready for the end of Earth Hour and not a drop of oil/coal/wind/nuclear energy will be saved.

Even the WWF admits saving energy isn’t the point.  The point is to make a statement about global warming and ‘raise awareness‘.  There is apparently a lone guy somewhere out there who hasn’t heard that Gaia has a fevah and the only cure is more cowbell, or something.  The chances of this sole soul appearing the very moment people sit in the dark ready to raise his awareness may be slim, but you never know.

UK readers may want to participate in the 2011 Earth Hour just to exercise the choice to turn out the lights before the government takes over the switch for them – or not.

Chez Bayonet will be lit brightly, joining in the counter-protest of Human Achievement Hour, a tradition also celebrated by David Menzies, who lives in Toronto and may cause hippie seizures during the darkathon:

“While everybody else has their lights off I will have every light in my house on,” said Menzies, as he prepared for his second installment in mocking the “phony” Earth Hour movement.  He’s also gone a step further. “I have rented four rotating Hollywood movie lights which will light up the sky for miles,” he said. “I don’t need to give you my address because all you need to do is look to the sky.”

take that, Gaia

Other suggested ways to enjoy the life-enhancing benefits of abundant, affordable energy abound – take your pick from the suggestions here.

However you choose to spend Earth Hour, be safe  and remember that setting your house ablaze with an errant candle is bad for Gaia.

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Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Mar. 24th 2011

Earth Hour approaches, but before token greens can sit around a candle for their annual darkathon, they must endure the trial of the snark.  This week David Suzuki is a depressed hippie, Google chooses sides and hippie food is bad for penguins.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

David Suzuki sat for an interview with rabble.ca and the lifelong hippie who calls himself an elder is unhappy that we focus on the economy instead of the ecology.  A selection of quotes:

  • “…global economics is actually speeding up the destruction”
  • “we revel in the economic antics of Bill Gates and these people and I think we’ve really lost our way in our obsessing with the economy”
  • “The problem we face is not only that the corporate agenda has become the government agenda, but that the economic system, which we exist within, is fundamentally flawed and inevitably destructive.”
  • “…economists actually think that, even though we actually live within a finite biosphere, the economy can grow forever. It can’t.”
Atlas giggled

He blames skeptics, business, government and everyone else for environmentalism’s failures, but acknowledges he’s wasted his life:

 

You’re asking someone who’s been, I think, a total failure. I’ve done the best I could, but I don’t see much traction.

Why yes, I would like some fries with my schadenfreude.

If Dave really wants to know why so few people wish to follow his model of economic destruction, he should look to his own hubris.  When he called for jail time for skeptical politicians a large portion of Canada and the world stopped listening to the suddenly embarrassing old hippie.

Part Two: Warmists & Scaremongers

Al Gore applauded Sen. Markey for using humor to hit back at skeptics.  The joke?

“…I’m worried that Republicans will overturn the law of gravity, sending us floating about the room.”

Al needs to get out more or read the Round-Up – his idea of funny, isn’t.

Earth Hour (this Saturday, 26th) used to be a global event that attracted the big guns to promote it and much of the world would sit in the dark for an hour and forget about the planet for the next 364 days and 23 hours.  If ever you needed evidence of the movements shrinking influence, I give you, err, Verne Troyer:

Earth Hour - digging deep

Oh, and the WWF says Earth Hour has nothing to do with saving energy.  Wait, what?

British journo Bryan Appleyard wonders why hippies haven’t claimed natural disasters in Russia and Pakistan as evidence to make the case for global warming.  No, really.

American Thinker wonders why the only building lighting up the NY skyline at night belongs to the global organization that insists we use less energy?  Hmmm

Don’t be Evil?  Google.org, the foundation wing of the Church of Search, has hired 21 scientists to combat skeptics.  What could possibly go wrong?

The situation in Japan’s nuclear power station remains unstable, but that doesn’t stop hippies from making as much of the disaster as possible.  Bill McKibben is concerned, of course.  Weepy Bill only has two settings, ‘alarmed’ and ‘ohmygodweregonnadie’

Big news of the week is that the alien’s prototype evil-robot George Monbiot was tested and performed very well, penning a column in favor of nuclear energy.  The real George was quickly returned to his desk, albeit with a blow-up cushion and a headache.  We’ll keep an eye open for future appearances by robo-George.

Minx the Merciless has created a searchable database of IPCC quotes, because nothing works better than using their own words against them.  She also has some words for scientists who prefer to call their critics anti-science instead of proving their hypotheses.  When the IPCC is finally laid to rest, there’ll be a Donna-sized bootprint on the dirt.

Australia struggles with the carbon-tax threat, which is wealth redistribution dressed in green.

Belgium has convicted Greenpeace protesters.  Big green’s useful idiots avoided time in the big house, but the hippies on trial in Denmark  may not be so lucky.  Popcorn, anyone?

The evil Koch Brothers and how they fund climate denial:

Greenpeace released a report last year about the Koch foundations supporting organizations that oppose “progressive clean energy and climate policy.” Koch gave $24.9 million from 2005 to 2008 to “organizations of the climate denial machine,”

Wow, that’s 12 times less money than Al Gore spent in three years.  They don’t mention that, oddly enough.

Are journalists bipolar?  How else to explain tension between climate alarmists scientists and journalists?

Yoof movements are beloved of the statists, which is why Aussie yoofs are gathering on web sites and President Obama is forming a Conservation Youth Corps. But don’t sweat it, yoofs of today limit their protesting to hitting a ‘Like’ button on Myfacespacebook.  Marching is for suckers.

Hippies on Ice.  Not some skating show featuring thin white guys in dreadlocks wearing patchouli-themed costumes, but the intrepid adventurers of the Catlin Survey.  Make your prediction for the date of their harrowing rescue in the comments.

Green on green action – always a fan favorite.

Grumpy old men get Bralizians, or something:

Richard Branson, Bill Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jim Cameron Attending the 2nd International Forum on Sustainability in Brazil

Peace love and lynch the deniers.  The mindset of the modern hippie.

ladies first

It’s great to be a climate scientist – even when you get all the details wrong, you’re still right.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

The troubled nuclear plant in Japan sucked up all the oxygen when it came to coverage on the TV news, but there are some very real things to worry about rather than the meltdown that wasn’t.

Wind power kills.  It’s true, wind is more dangerous than nuclear in the US.

Oh noes, natural variability causes weather extremes, not a trace gas essential to life on Earth:

The first chink in the armor came back in the fall of 2010, when scientists from the Physical Sciences Division of the Earth System Research Laboratory of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration presented the results of their preliminary investigation.  They concluded that “despite this strong evidence for a warming planet, greenhouse gas forcing fails to explain the 2010 heat wave over western Russia. The natural process of atmospheric blocking, and the climate impacts induced by such blocking, are the principal cause for this heat wave.”

The Gaia-saving Chevy Volt is going backwards – it’s only getting about 27 miles on an electric charge before the gas-powered motor kicks in.  But corporate welfare crack-whore GE has pledged to buy 50,000 Volts.  At a tax-payer subsidy of $7500 each that’s only $375 million.  Bargain.

Good news for Africa, Canadian researchers have found a cheap way to treat malaria.  Now the greens will have to find another way to depopulate Africa.

Fire up the cars and generators.  Turn on every light in the house, crank the heat and open the windows.  Global warming is good for wine production.  Save the grapes!

Talking sense about ecology – global warming does not explain problems with biodiversity:

…when it comes to managing and conserving species and ecosystems, trying to figure out exactly how much of any one particular decline is due to greenhouse gases is not necessarily helpful, and may actually not be possible.

Pesky Kilimanjaro icecap refuses to die, hippie credibility hardest hit.

A polar bear dies of brain damage, and the littlest icon will be stuffed and mounted.

fabulous bear is fabulous

Anthony Watts headed west and discovered a lot of wind turbines aren’t working.

Uh oh, a shipwreck in the South Atlantic has lubed up local penguins, and not in the good way.  The ship was transporting soy beans – hippie manna.  Oh, the ironing.

The IPCC sayeth, and the Minx never forgets.  And asks questions.  Questions they won’t/can’t/don’t want to answer.

Of bird shredders and cats and hippies not knowing the difference between a robin and a raptor.

In OZ, as everywhere – ultimately it is about the science:

Many new folk are appearing on the anti-carbon tax team, and here’s the weird thing for we seasoned skeptics, some of these oppose the tax, yet “believe” the science (?!) “It’s too hard” they say. They seem to think if we just beat the tax, we can ignore the reason the tax is supposedly there in the first place.  The science is the whole official reason for the tax, and if we don’t force the crowds to notice the corruption, the cheating, and the way science is exploited, then we are asking to be bludgeoned with it again.

Who knew that if a government shuts down your business they can still expect you to pay a green tax?

California’s AB32 green law is on hold after a court found it in breach of… California’s green laws.

Finally a cause for global warming ee can all agree on, climate change causes climate change.  Add it to The List.

President Obama finally lifted his objections to offshore drilling.  In Brazil. Wait, what?

The EPA – victim or misanthrope? You decide.

UK Prime Minister Cameron promised the greenest government evah, until the numbers didn’t add up.  Odd how it’s all fun until the money runs out.

Grist grinds its molars at the prospect of more miners prospecting for coal:

…despite his administration’s rhetorical embrace of clean energy, Obama is effectively using modest wind and solar investments as cover for a broader embrace of dirty fuels. It’s the same strategy BP, Chevron, and other major polluters use: tout modest environmental investments in multi-million dollar PR campaigns, while putting the real money into fossil fuel development.

Don’t they remember that it doesn’t matter what fuel America uses – the very act of selecting Obama was enough to quell the rising seas and heal Gaia.

Part Four: AGW in the News

Hippies celebrate that wind turbines survived the Japanese earthquake:

Even the Kamisu semi-offshore wind farm, located about 300km [186 miles] from the epicenter of the quake, survived. Its anti-earthquake “battle proof design” came through with flying colors.

For comparison, the Fukushima power plant was only 75 miles [120km] from the epicenter and also had to survive the following tsunami.

Unable to win in the court of public opinion or the ballot box – desperate warmists turn to the legal system to save the green agenda.

Is global warming a cargo-cult?  I’m not convinced about the cargo part, but the cult?  Yep.

Not all religions are alike.  In Oz, an old religion warns against voting for neo-pagans.

Germany’s Der Spiegel takes apart the environmental movement in a long but-oh-so refreshing look at the gap between green marketing and reality.

Alberta approves Canada’s largest wind farm, because killing ducks with tailing ponds was getting old.

John Gummer gnashes his gums at Australia and tells the colonials how to proceed:

Even if they were all wrong and we acted, the result would be that we would have a cleaner planet, more able to cope with feeding, housing, and clothing those 9 billion people. If, however, we follow the sceptics and they turn out to be wrong, then we would leave our children a legacy of destruction. The risk is all one way, which explains why in Britain, scepticism is confined to the extremes.

It also explains why Britain is broke and facing a powerless future, but he forgot to mention that part.

Britain may scale back nuclear power plans after the Japanese earthquake, because it doesn’t really need the power anyway.  Oh, wait. Nevermind.

More bad news for the Volt – Forbes doesn’t like it.

Coca-Cola sponsors Earth Hour and everyone pretends not to notice how the drinks giant infuses its most popular product with CO2 as they sit in the dark to reduce CO2 in the atmosphere. Coke says:

Jon Woods, Country Manager for Coca-Cola Great Britain and Ireland, said, “Once again Coca-Cola is pleased to give its full support to Earth Hour. As a business, Coca-Cola works hard to behave responsibly and in a way that leaves as little impact on the planet as possible. We hope that our activity this year, more prominent than ever before, encourages our consumers to do likewise. Climate change is one of the most serious issues of our time and all businesses must roll up their sleeves in response- we will be doing our best to ensure that this year’s event is a resounding success.”

Hippies and thinking it through, not a strength.

Watching polar bears float on ice is less likely to persuade you about global warming than discovering your basement is flooded.  Or something.

Blasphemy!  The Daily Telegraph wonders if Climate Week might be greenwashing.  The horror.

The global carbon credit market, deader than a parrot.

San Francisco aims to go 100% renewable by 2020.  Good luck polishing that turd, Mr. Mayor.

The Gray Lady celebrates 3 years of BC’s carbon tax.  Meanwhile in BC, residents and politicians are plotting its demise.

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Part Five: Global Hottie

Gisele Bundchen was 2010 Earth Hour Ambassador.  We featured 2011 choice Miranda Kerr a week or so ago, so we salute the hippies realization that hot can be a very good thing with a look back to last year.

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Mar. 24th 2011

Earth Hour approaches, but before token greens can sit around a candle for their annual darkathon, they must endure the trial of the snark.  This week David Suzuki is a depressed hippie, Google chooses sides and hippie food is bad for penguins.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

David Suzuki sat for an interview with rabble.ca and the lifelong hippie who calls himself an elder is unhappy that we focus on the economy instead of the ecology.  A selection of quotes:

  • “…global economics is actually speeding up the destruction”
  • “we revel in the economic antics of Bill Gates and these people and I think we’ve really lost our way in our obsessing with the economy”
  • “The problem we face is not only that the corporate agenda has become the government agenda, but that the economic system, which we exist within, is fundamentally flawed and inevitably destructive.”
  • “…economists actually think that, even though we actually live within a finite biosphere, the economy can grow forever. It can’t.”
Atlas giggled

He blames skeptics, business, government and everyone else for environmentalism’s failures, but acknowledges he’s wasted his life:

 

You’re asking someone who’s been, I think, a total failure. I’ve done the best I could, but I don’t see much traction.

Why yes, I would like some fries with my schadenfreude.

If Dave really wants to know why so few people wish to follow his model of economic destruction, he should look to his own hubris.  When he called for jail time for skeptical politicians a large portion of Canada and the world stopped listening to the suddenly embarrassing old hippie.

Part Two: Warmists & Scaremongers

Al Gore applauded Sen. Markey for using humor to hit back at skeptics.  The joke?

“…I’m worried that Republicans will overturn the law of gravity, sending us floating about the room.”

Al needs to get out more or read the Round-Up – his idea of funny, isn’t.

Earth Hour (this Saturday, 26th) used to be a global event that attracted the big guns to promote it and much of the world would sit in the dark for an hour and forget about the planet for the next 364 days and 23 hours.  If ever you needed evidence of the movements shrinking influence, I give you, err, Verne Troyer:

Earth Hour - digging deep

Oh, and the WWF says Earth Hour has nothing to do with saving energy.  Wait, what?

British journo Bryan Appleyard wonders why hippies haven’t claimed natural disasters in Russia and Pakistan as evidence to make the case for global warming.  No, really.

American Thinker wonders why the only building lighting up the NY skyline at night belongs to the global organization that insists we use less energy?  Hmmm

Don’t be Evil?  Google.org, the foundation wing of the Church of Search, has hired 21 scientists to combat skeptics.  What could possibly go wrong?

The situation in Japan’s nuclear power station remains unstable, but that doesn’t stop hippies from making as much of the disaster as possible.  Bill McKibben is concerned, of course.  Weepy Bill only has two settings, ‘alarmed’ and ‘ohmygodweregonnadie’

Big news of the week is that the alien’s prototype evil-robot George Monbiot was tested and performed very well, penning a column in favor of nuclear energy.  The real George was quickly returned to his desk, albeit with a blow-up cushion and a headache.  We’ll keep an eye open for future appearances by robo-George.

Minx the Merciless has created a searchable database of IPCC quotes, because nothing works better than using their own words against them.  She also has some words for scientists who prefer to call their critics anti-science instead of proving their hypotheses.  When the IPCC is finally laid to rest, there’ll be a Donna-sized bootprint on the dirt.

Australia struggles with the carbon-tax threat, which is wealth redistribution dressed in green.

Belgium has convicted Greenpeace protesters.  Big green’s useful idiots avoided time in the big house, but the hippies on trial in Denmark  may not be so lucky.  Popcorn, anyone?

The evil Koch Brothers and how they fund climate denial:

Greenpeace released a report last year about the Koch foundations supporting organizations that oppose “progressive clean energy and climate policy.” Koch gave $24.9 million from 2005 to 2008 to “organizations of the climate denial machine,”

Wow, that’s 12 times less money than Al Gore spent in three years.  They don’t mention that, oddly enough.

Are journalists bipolar?  How else to explain tension between climate alarmists scientists and journalists?

Yoof movements are beloved of the statists, which is why Aussie yoofs are gathering on web sites and President Obama is forming a Conservation Youth Corps. But don’t sweat it, yoofs of today limit their protesting to hitting a ‘Like’ button on Myfacespacebook.  Marching is for suckers.

Hippies on Ice.  Not some skating show featuring thin white guys in dreadlocks wearing patchouli-themed costumes, but the intrepid adventurers of the Catlin Survey.  Make your prediction for the date of their harrowing rescue in the comments.

Green on green action – always a fan favorite.

Grumpy old men get Bralizians, or something:

Richard Branson, Bill Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jim Cameron Attending the 2nd International Forum on Sustainability in Brazil

Peace love and lynch the deniers.  The mindset of the modern hippie.

ladies first

It’s great to be a climate scientist – even when you get all the details wrong, you’re still right.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

The troubled nuclear plant in Japan sucked up all the oxygen when it came to coverage on the TV news, but there are some very real things to worry about rather than the meltdown that wasn’t.

Wind power kills.  It’s true, wind is more dangerous than nuclear in the US.

Oh noes, natural variability causes weather extremes, not a trace gas essential to life on Earth:

The first chink in the armor came back in the fall of 2010, when scientists from the Physical Sciences Division of the Earth System Research Laboratory of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration presented the results of their preliminary investigation.  They concluded that “despite this strong evidence for a warming planet, greenhouse gas forcing fails to explain the 2010 heat wave over western Russia. The natural process of atmospheric blocking, and the climate impacts induced by such blocking, are the principal cause for this heat wave.”

The Gaia-saving Chevy Volt is going backwards – it’s only getting about 27 miles on an electric charge before the gas-powered motor kicks in.  But corporate welfare crack-whore GE has pledged to buy 50,000 Volts.  At a tax-payer subsidy of $7500 each that’s only $375 million.  Bargain.

Good news for Africa, Canadian researchers have found a cheap way to treat malaria.  Now the greens will have to find another way to depopulate Africa.

Fire up the cars and generators.  Turn on every light in the house, crank the heat and open the windows.  Global warming is good for wine production.  Save the grapes!

Talking sense about ecology – global warming does not explain problems with biodiversity:

…when it comes to managing and conserving species and ecosystems, trying to figure out exactly how much of any one particular decline is due to greenhouse gases is not necessarily helpful, and may actually not be possible.

Pesky Kilimanjaro icecap refuses to die, hippie credibility hardest hit.

A polar bear dies of brain damage, and the littlest icon will be stuffed and mounted.

fabulous bear is fabulous

Anthony Watts headed west and discovered a lot of wind turbines aren’t working.

Uh oh, a shipwreck in the South Atlantic has lubed up local penguins, and not in the good way.  The ship was transporting soy beans – hippie manna.  Oh, the ironing.

The IPCC sayeth, and the Minx never forgets.  And asks questions.  Questions they won’t/can’t/don’t want to answer.

Of bird shredders and cats and hippies not knowing the difference between a robin and a raptor.

In OZ, as everywhere – ultimately it is about the science:

Many new folk are appearing on the anti-carbon tax team, and here’s the weird thing for we seasoned skeptics, some of these oppose the tax, yet “believe” the science (?!) “It’s too hard” they say. They seem to think if we just beat the tax, we can ignore the reason the tax is supposedly there in the first place.  The science is the whole official reason for the tax, and if we don’t force the crowds to notice the corruption, the cheating, and the way science is exploited, then we are asking to be bludgeoned with it again.

Who knew that if a government shuts down your business they can still expect you to pay a green tax?

California’s AB32 green law is on hold after a court found it in breach of… California’s green laws.

Finally a cause for global warming ee can all agree on, climate change causes climate change.  Add it to The List.

President Obama finally lifted his objections to offshore drilling.  In Brazil. Wait, what?

The EPA – victim or misanthrope? You decide.

UK Prime Minister Cameron promised the greenest government evah, until the numbers didn’t add up.  Odd how it’s all fun until the money runs out.

Grist grinds its molars at the prospect of more miners prospecting for coal:

…despite his administration’s rhetorical embrace of clean energy, Obama is effectively using modest wind and solar investments as cover for a broader embrace of dirty fuels. It’s the same strategy BP, Chevron, and other major polluters use: tout modest environmental investments in multi-million dollar PR campaigns, while putting the real money into fossil fuel development.

Don’t they remember that it doesn’t matter what fuel America uses – the very act of selecting Obama was enough to quell the rising seas and heal Gaia.

Part Four: AGW in the News

Hippies celebrate that wind turbines survived the Japanese earthquake:

Even the Kamisu semi-offshore wind farm, located about 300km [186 miles] from the epicenter of the quake, survived. Its anti-earthquake “battle proof design” came through with flying colors.

For comparison, the Fukushima power plant was only 75 miles [120km] from the epicenter and also had to survive the following tsunami.

Unable to win in the court of public opinion or the ballot box – desperate warmists turn to the legal system to save the green agenda.

Is global warming a cargo-cult?  I’m not convinced about the cargo part, but the cult?  Yep.

Not all religions are alike.  In Oz, an old religion warns against voting for neo-pagans.

Germany’s Der Spiegel takes apart the environmental movement in a long but-oh-so refreshing look at the gap between green marketing and reality.

Alberta approves Canada’s largest wind farm, because killing ducks with tailing ponds was getting old.

John Gummer gnashes his gums at Australia and tells the colonials how to proceed:

Even if they were all wrong and we acted, the result would be that we would have a cleaner planet, more able to cope with feeding, housing, and clothing those 9 billion people. If, however, we follow the sceptics and they turn out to be wrong, then we would leave our children a legacy of destruction. The risk is all one way, which explains why in Britain, scepticism is confined to the extremes.

It also explains why Britain is broke and facing a powerless future, but he forgot to mention that part.

Britain may scale back nuclear power plans after the Japanese earthquake, because it doesn’t really need the power anyway.  Oh, wait. Nevermind.

More bad news for the Volt – Forbes doesn’t like it.

Coca-Cola sponsors Earth Hour and everyone pretends not to notice how the drinks giant infuses its most popular product with CO2 as they sit in the dark to reduce CO2 in the atmosphere. Coke says:

Jon Woods, Country Manager for Coca-Cola Great Britain and Ireland, said, “Once again Coca-Cola is pleased to give its full support to Earth Hour. As a business, Coca-Cola works hard to behave responsibly and in a way that leaves as little impact on the planet as possible. We hope that our activity this year, more prominent than ever before, encourages our consumers to do likewise. Climate change is one of the most serious issues of our time and all businesses must roll up their sleeves in response- we will be doing our best to ensure that this year’s event is a resounding success.”

Hippies and thinking it through, not a strength.

Watching polar bears float on ice is less likely to persuade you about global warming than discovering your basement is flooded.  Or something.

Blasphemy!  The Daily Telegraph wonders if Climate Week might be greenwashing.  The horror.

The global carbon credit market, deader than a parrot.

San Francisco aims to go 100% renewable by 2020.  Good luck polishing that turd, Mr. Mayor.

The Gray Lady celebrates 3 years of BC’s carbon tax.  Meanwhile in BC, residents and politicians are plotting its demise.

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Part Five: Global Hottie

Gisele Bundchen was 2010 Earth Hour Ambassador.  We featured 2011 choice Miranda Kerr a week or so ago, so we salute the hippies realization that hot can be a very good thing with a look back to last year.

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Greenpeace doth protest too much

Greenpeace hippies were arrested in Courtice, Ontario yesterday for delaying hearings on new nuclear reactors for the province.

…nine members of Greenpeace stood in front of the joint review panel on stage holding banners reading “No nukes are safe. Stop Darlington.” Some had tape over their mouths, others chained themselves to the table.  Greenpeace spokesman Shawn Patrick Stensil said there was nothing stopping the panel from proceeding with the activists silently standing in front of them.  “They’re just bearing witness to the fact that these hearings are moving forward while ignoring one of the greatest threats to future generations of Ontarians – that is, a Fukushima-scale accident,” he said.

Except there was no ‘accident’ at Fukushima.  Not in the traditional sense of a technology failure or human error.  The Japanese plant was rocked by a 9.0 earthquake and then smashed with a huge tsunami – yet the reactor cores remain contained and every indication is that leaked radiation remains low and manageable.  Not to minimize the frightening reality on the ground for local people, but this could have been a whole order of magnitude worse if the plant had not been so robust.

Even deep greenie George Monbiot underwent a conversion after witnessing how tough Fukushima is:

I still loathe the liars who run the nuclear industry. Yes, I would prefer to see the entire sector shut down, if there were harmless alternatives. But there are no ideal solutions. Every energy technology carries a cost; so does the absence of energy technologies. Atomic energy has just been subjected to one of the harshest of possible tests, and the impact on people and the planet has been small. The crisis at Fukushima has converted me to the cause of nuclear power.

Take a moment to assimilate that – George Monbiot, a pro-nuke convert.  The reason for his change of heart/mind is simple, he recognizes a simple truth that Greenpeace denies – the modern world cannot function without affordable energy:

…how do we drive our textile mills, brick kilns, blast furnaces and electric railways – not to mention advanced industrial processes? Rooftop solar panels? The moment you consider the demands of the whole economy is the moment at which you fall out of love with local energy production.

I’ve written about Greenpeace the energy deniers before:

The question is what Greenpeace would replace our current energy with, but beyond sweeping generalizations; it has no answer. It’s not enough to simply deny us the means of living a civilized life while claiming that the sky is falling. They need to get out of the way and let the world generate the power it needs, preferably with nuclear plants that emit no pollution; real pollution, that is, not harmless but demonized CO2.

The hippies that delayed the nuclear hearings for five hours are no-solution, anti-human activists only interested in getting their faces in the papers and drumming up more money for Greenpeace.  The organization exists only to raise money and pursue its misanthropic agenda.

Here’s a challenge for Greenpeace, put up or shut up.

In my other life as a writer, the unforgettable rule of telling a good story is to ‘show, not tell’.  It’s time for Greenpeace, the NRDC, Sierra Club et al to do just that – stop preaching and show us that what you demand for the rest of us is possible.

Design and build a small town that relies only on your approved energy sources.  Populate it with as many thousands of well-meaning hippies you can find and show us all how life is under the Big Green thumb.  Even on a small scale, say a few thousand people in a few hundred homes, for a couple of years.  Big Green could raise the cash to undertake such an event – organizations like GE and others might throw free tech at the idea just for the publicity. If it works, you get to point to Hippieville and say “see, it’s possible, we did it.”

I realize that such an idea is radical in that it means actually doing something other than inconveniencing people or climbing things that don’t belong to you, but that’s my challenge to the hippies.  Show us, or get out of the way.

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A tale of two deserts

Climate Progress reports on a problem in Texas that is causing the state’s rural population to relocate.  The reasons given are global warming and poor resource management:

One of the major reasons that there’s such a radical population shift is that central Texas is changing from arid grassland to uninhabitable desert, in part due to greenhouse pollution from the fossil fuels once buried under the ground. Other unsustainable practices, such as overpumping of groundwater, unregulated sprawl, and poor conservation practices are accelerating the desertification [emphasis mine]

Sounds bad, right?  It is.  Here’s a selection of quotes on Texan desertification (from CP):

  • 2002: “Texas ranchers feel drought sting.”
  • 2003: “Central Texas is in the midst of a seven-year drought.”
  • 2005: “It’s been dry, it is dry, and it will likely stay dry through the winter, according to the state’s climatologist Dr. John Nielsen-Gammon based at Texas A&M University’s College of Geosciences.”
  • 2006: “Texas’ drought losses have reached an estimated $4.1 billion, eclipsing the $2.1 billion mark set in 1998, according to Texas Cooperative Extension economists.”

There’s more, all in the same vein.  Drought is bad.  Farmers suffer.  Ranchers are out of business and none of this is a good thing because global warming is to blame.

Another state is in similar difficulty, its farmers stare at prime land that is left fallow or dying.  Fields that once boasted some of the finest crops in the country are dusty and barren, unemployment levels have soared to 45% in some communities, farmers are quitting the land and revenue losses from the once lush land only add to the state’s declining economy.

The state in all this trouble is California, but the cause of their Agrigeddon isn’t global warming (real or imagined), but green activism.  California’s central valley is a dustbowl because of the efforts by the Natural Resources Defense Committee and others to save a meaningless fish, the Delta Smelt.

sign of the times

According to Climate Progress, desertification and ruined farmers is a problem when the cause is global warming.  When the cause is misguided hippies?  Crickets, chirping.

In the eyes of greens, not all deserts are created equal.

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