Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Mar. 8th 2012

The Hippie of the Week suffered a temporary case of multiple personality disorder, a Kennedy proves technology saves lives and we don’t recommend the soup down under. No, really.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

This week’s Hippie of the Week comes to you by a tip from Anthony Watts, skeptic godfather and man behind the most-read climate site in the world, after some odd behavior in the comments on this post. While hippies might see this as evidence of collusion between evil skeptics, it’s really not. Anthony simply suggested I use his recommendation, or something bad would happen to my racehorse. I don’t own any sort of horse, but when faced with an offer you can’t refuse, why look a gift hippie in the mouth?

The HOTW winner this week is Malte Humpert, Founder of the Arctic Institute. Malte disagreed with things being said about the Arctic Institute on WUWT, but felt it necessary to create sock-puppet identities to defend his case. He got caught, and made a statement on the Arctic Institute’s web page:

Updated March 10

The quote by Malte Humpert and his picture have been removed following a copyright claim by Humpert and/or the Arctic Institute.

To comply with a copyright claim by Malte Humpert, the image that was here has been replaced with this picture of a friendly donkey. Because who would complain about a pic of a nice ass?
What Humpert did at WUWT wasn’t as egregious as Peter Gleick’s illegal phishing of the Heartland Institute, but it indicates a disturbing lack of professionalism. Hippies with strong feelings about geographic areas of Gaia like the Arctic and Pacific would do better to check themselves into Institutions instead of running around founding Institutes.

Unfortunately for Malte Humpert, the efforts to disguise his personal identity at WUIWT only led to a closer look at the Arctic Institute. It turns out not to be an ivory tower filled with learned men with frostbite stories and a penchant for polar bear jerky, but Humpert’s apartment in Washington DC. Oddly, the building has a history of harboring pesky critters:

[REDACTED*] House has bed bugs. I do not think that all of the apartments are infested – but mine is! I have been covered in bites and am miserable.

Note, this is an anonymous report to bedbugregistry.com for the same address, not a report from Humpert. Probably.

Congratulations to Malte Humpert for the big HOTW win, and for being the latest victim of boomerang activism. That’s when whatever you throw comes full circle and smacks you in the back of the head when you’re not expecting it, in case you wondered.

*I’ve got the link, but there’s no reason to publish Humpert’s address.

Part Two: Warmists

Stop the world, Joe wants to get off. The Rommulan suggests we need a ‘massive and rapid deployment of zero-carbon power. It’s a nice idea, but you’ll have to make do with a massive and rapid deployment of hysteria instead:

If you want to have a serious chance at averting catastrophic global warming, then we need to start phasing out all fossil fuels as soon as possible.  Natural gas isn’t a bridge fuel from a climate perspective.  Carbon-free power is the bridge fuel until we can figure out how to go carbon negative on a large scale by the end of the century.

Unicorn futures are up.

Your web searches are increasingly powered by wind turbines. Which gives concerned parents a new angle on an old problem. Kids, every time you search for young ladies who can’t afford clothes, an eagle dies.

Et tu, Gray Lady? The New York Times finds something to like about global warming. Wait, what?

More Google – they’re busy inventing Reefview.

Australian scientists mapping the Great Barrier Reef will broadcast their findings in partnership with Google, emulating its “Street View” to spotlight the impact of climate change.

Dissolving Nemo, or Spongebob Nopants? Ocean acidification rate is unprecedented, because you’re not buying global warming so maybe this scary-sounding stuff will convince you instead:

The oceans act like a sponge to draw down excess carbon dioxide from the air; the gas reacts with seawater to form carbonic acid, which over time is neutralized by fossil carbonate shells on the seafloor. But if CO2 goes into the oceans too quickly, it can deplete the carbonate ions that corals, mollusks and some plankton need for reef and shell-building.

The EU is facing an all-out trade war over efforts to carbon-tax airlines using its airspace, but Germany blinked first.

Eating out in Oz isn’t what it used to be:

That’s right — this pop-up restaurant, which is open from March 2 through the 21st in honor of the Melbourne Food and Wine Festival, wants you to get all up in its custom-made toilets. The green eatery is collecting human urine and using it to fertilize soybean and canola crops. The restaurant, which is designed by Joost Bakker who is clearly a maniac, then uses unrefined canola oil to generate electricity for all of its operations.

The idea may have been inspired by President Obama’s advice to Republicans that it was time to eat your peas, but if so, something was lost in the translation to strine.

soup of the day, anyone?

America suffered a bad week for tornadoes, but as it worked to clear up the mess, Kevin Trenberth rushed to blame global warming. Because crisis. Waste. Never.

A Kennedy used Twitter to call Sen. Inhofe some names that would have brought howls of protest if anyone on the right had done the same. The good news is that in the modern world, Kennedy’s use Twitter to get themselves into trouble, not bridges and young female campaign workers.

Hey teachers, leave those kids alone.

Mauritius is to celebrate Earth Hour, but seems unclear on the concept.

Why does the Department of Energy need assault weapons and grenades? Okay, we understand the EPA is pushing serious mission creep, but this could completely redefine interdepartmental battles.

California shore birds are threatened by rising sea levels. If only they had wings.

Kiribati is negotiating to buy some land in Fiji, so that when Kiribati eventually disappears under the ocean it can live on a new threatened island. Darwin wept.

She’s back. A sure sign of a new la Laframboise post is when a picture of Raj Pachauri face down in a gutter with a bootprint on his back appears in my feed reader. This week we learn the hapless, hounded head of the IPCC has a dodgy history:

The most explosive revelation involves a 1996 Delhi High Court ruling in which a judge said he had “no hesitation in coming to the conclusion” that Pachauri and two others had “sworn to false affidavits.” The judge went on to remark that the business affairs of the non-profit convention center at the heart of the lawsuit were “not safe in the hands of officers” such as Pachauri (the judge’s ruling is backed up here).

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Gaia is getting a solar flare tan today, but overall the Sun has pretty much kept its hat on this cycle.

British Prime Minister David Cameron says wind farms have been wasteful of public money. Which prompts the question why he allowed Chris Huhne to build so many. The GWPF figures wind has added £45 billion to the cost of meeting the UK’s climate targets.

BRITAIN could meet its climate change targets in 2020 for £45 billion less if it abandoned wind power in favour of cheaper gas-fired power plants and nuclear reactors, an independent report has found. The saving would rise to £150 billion by 2050 because of the huge costs associated with building and running the proposed 32,000 wind turbines.

The Spectator has the best article on the daft idea of wind power, it’s long but worth the read.

La Nina isn’t going away, which might make things chilly for a while longer.

March is Earth Hour month, which naturally brings the almost Newtonian response: ‘Carbon Belch Day‘. CO2 is innocent, free it. Or something.

Parts of Australia that were warned to expect permanent drought are awash this week, and warmists are spinning faster than bird shredders in a gale to explain away their incorrect forecasts. But neither Andrew Bolt or the Internet ever forgets, the memory hole isn’t what it used to be.

Good news for the spotted owl, the Obama administration is taking action to save it. By shooting barred owls. Wait, what?

why me?

Any computer model can suffer Garbage-In, Garbage-Out errors, but it’s particularly embarrassing when the model is supposed to predict when actual garbage will show up.

Go green, kill a senior:

…rising fuel prices can in no small part be attributed to the environmental mania which is at the heart of the movement. It isn’t oil and gas companies that are killing the elderly with high fuel prices, it’s carbon mania and environmentalism.

Oh noes. Don’t blame micro-funded think tanks for the public’s refusal to buy into the global warming narrative, it’s the fault of those Big Green funders:

Environmental funders spent a whopping $10 billion between 2000 and 2009 but achieved relatively little because they failed to underwrite grassroots groups that are essential for any large-scale change, the report says.

NASA says the environmental impact of Keystone XL would be about the same as that of a large power station. James Hansen hardest hit.

Global warming is a forgotten topic in the halls of European politics.

Delingpole notices that skeptics are winning:

Something extraordinary is happening in the great Climate Wars. I had a taste of it just the other day on an LBC talk show. The producer had only booked me in for a ten-minute slot, in case the listeners weren’t interested in my boring new book about that tediously hackneyed subject Man Made Global Warming. But the switchboards were jammed and the station ended up keeping me in for a full hour to reply to all the calls.

There was one big problem though: “We can hardly find ANYONE who disagrees with you,” whispered the show’s host, Julia Hartley-Brewer. This was true. By the end, things had got so desperate that I found myself accidentally picking fights with callers who were on my side.

Part Four: Global Hottie

While Scarlett Johnasson hasn’t yet slapped a restraining order on the round-up, we’re not taking any chances. So this week, we hop over the pond to see what Britain has to offer. And we found English actress and undercover hottie, Emily Mortimer. Star of Hugo and many other movies that are probably good but we haven’t seen. Emily Mortimer, who knew?

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Mar. 1st, 2012

A Guardianista penned an Ode to a Wind Farm, global warming makes suckers of Texans and a mild-mannered climatologist dismantled the alarmist agenda.

All this, and a hottie too. It must be Thursday.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

This week’s HOTW isn’t a criminal mastermind, skillful phisherman or even a scientist. But he does write for The Guardian. Congratulations to Bill McGuire for his eye-popping peek into the future of global warming:

The bottom line is that through our climate-changing activities we are loading the dice in favour of escalating geological havoc at a time when we can most do without it. Unless there is a dramatic and completely unexpected turnaround in the way in which the human race manages itself and the planet, then long-term prospects for our civilisation look increasingly grim. At a time when an additional 220,000 people are lining up at the global soup kitchen each and every night; when energy, water and food resources are coming under ever-growing pressure, and when the debilitating effects of anthropogenic climate change are insinuating themselves increasingly into every nook and cranny of our world and our lives, the last thing we need is for the dozing subterranean giant to awaken.

Dozing subterranean giant? Oh noes, does he mean Godzilla is nigh? Or that Nessie will emerge from her Loch to devour wee Scot bairns in their slumber? Nope, he’s blaming the weather for geologic convulsions:

A changing climate isn’t just about floods, droughts and heatwaves. It brings erupting volcanoes and catastrophic earthquakes too

It’s the flying tundra theory again. Joe Romm claims there’s no such thing as crisis fatigue because there’s no such thing as climate alarmism, or something.

Bill McGuire disagrees, methinks.

Part Two: Warmists

Men of the world, rejoice. We can use global warming to explain the awkward problem of shrinkage. No, really:

Modern mammals, including humans, could be at risk of shrinking as a result of global warming, just as teeny prehistoric horses shrank to an even smaller size when temperatures rose 56 million years ago.

Also suffering shrinkage is another ‘green jobs’ success, A123 Systems, a battery firm. They received $390 million in subsidies, but just laid off 125 workers. Apparently the business plan was good for getting a front listing in the Yellow Pages, but weak thereafter.

Oh noes, global warming causes vampire bats in Texas. Add it to The List.

give us a kiss, y'all

Don’t believe the maxim that all publicity is good publicity. A new documentary about water by the makers of ‘An Inconvenient Truth’ features none other than Peter Gleick. The movie is likely to inhabit a small, unloved corner of Netflix as a result.

A scientist planned on accepting a Heartland Institute invitation to debate, and his warmist colleagues called to explain: SHUT UP:

…when he agreed to participate, a dozen or so colleagues let him know that they thought he should not attend. “There is a sense among climate scientists that they shouldn’t debate these guys, that it just plays into the idea that there is a debate.” said Denning. “I respectfully disagree.”

Good for Denning. Also, a newish blog from an actual scientist wants to engage both sides of the global warming debate, and upset Peter Gleick with her blog name: All Models Are Wrong. She’s added to the Blogroll, because we need folks like her.

Norway has suspended financial support for the WWF, pending an embezzlement scandal in Tanzania.

Toy-maker Lego has invested $500 million on green energy. Give it a year or so and that decision will hurt the bottom line worse than finding one of their bricks in the middle of the night with a bare foot.

Uh oh. The IPCC might be having a rough time of it soon, unless pesky nature falls into line and follows the modeled predictions.

It’s a bad time to be a bird. If the bird shredders don’t get you, global warming will. And on the topic of bird shredders, a Guardian article on the whirly blades of avian doom reads like a love letter. Some excerpts:

its three blades, stilled for now, like stupendous scimitars wielded by a giant.

The structures themselves have the panache of Thomas Telford’s 1826 suspension bridge across the Menai Straits, or Isambard Kingdom Brunel’s Great Britain, launched in 1843 and the world’s first propeller-driven ocean-going iron ship.

A Victorian, steampunk version would surely have gothic trimmings, or be painted in stripes like old lighthouses. Perhaps in future, there will be retro-turbines that emulate such traditional nautical structures. But for now, these towers could not be further from the low-tech cliches of the green imagination.

The Thanet shore is being brought to life by winds that once filled the sails of sloops and brigs and now drive these machines, so grand, so gentle.

Bludgeoned gulls were unavailable to critique the ode to a wind farm, but were said to have been left in pieces by it, or something.

Any UK folks who don’t feel the love and want to dry hump the nearest wind turbine like a frisky terrier on great Aunt Maude’s leg are out of luck if they think they can do anything to stop them. Learn to love them, and look up raptor recipes, it’s the future.

President Obama wants America to get 80% of its energy from clean sources by 2035. He’s betting the farm on algae, but to be sure his prediction comes true is also dismantling the domestic economy so that it won’t be needing much pesky energy anyhow.

Australian politicos know that the carbon tax is a vote loser, which explains the shameless propaganda being thrown at the poor upside-down populace:

Once again, the population is treated like total morons. “CP”, or carbon particle, lectures us on how we should cut emissions and lead virtuous low carbon lives. Unfortunately, particulate carbon has NOTHING to do with global warming, climate change or whatever. Carbon dioxide, the alleged part-cause of the modern warming, is a harmless, invisible, trace gas.

A carbon-conscious hippie wrestles with the age-old problem of whether to live in his urban New Jersey home, or his rural Maine retreat without a trace of self-awareness that the problem might be owning two homes. Do as they say, or shut up.

UK farmers are facing the triple-threat of Bluetongue, Schmallenberg and drought, all caused by global warming, or a milder winter, whichever gets the better headline.

NASA has mapped a giant crack in Antarctica. My guess is alarmists will blame global warming rather than all those pesky dancing penguins. At least NASA can still make maps, real science seems to be too hard for them to figure out any more.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

‘Father’ of the modern global warming movement, NASA’s James Hansen predicted three scenarios for global temperatures back in 1998, and cunningly named them A, B, and C. And Gaia shrugged, then chose none of the above.

Richard Lindzen, MIT boffin and seriously smart dude, spoke to the UK parliament about global warming, and destroyed the alarmists without once getting over-excited:

Stated briefly, I will simply try to clarify what the debate over climate change is really about. It most certainly is not about whether climate is changing: it always is. It is not about whether CO2 is increasing: it clearly is. It is not about whether the increase in CO2, by itself, will lead to some warming: it should. The debate is simply over the matter of how much warming the increase in CO2 can lead to, and the connection of such warming to the innumerable claimed catastrophes. The evidence is that the increase in CO2 will lead to very little warming, and that the connection of this minimal warming (or even significant warming) to the purported catastrophes is also minimal. The arguments on which the catastrophic claims are made are extremely weak – and commonly acknowledged as such. They are sometimes overtly dishonest.

Oh noes, GISS admits it IS the Sun, stupid. The IPCC, notsomuch. No wonder the IPCC may have outlived its usefulness, at least according to Judith Curry.

Good news, we might figure out the key to immortality before global warming takes us out. It’s all about flatworms.

take one, three times daily

Here’s consensus we can believe in – skeptic blogs sweep the awards board. Soylent is over the moon.

A German meteorologist warns us to prepare for cooling, not warming. He’ll be in Von Luger’s cooler in no time for saying stuff like that.

Data manipulation of mythic proportions? Tallbloke knows what happened to the ARGO noughts.

Hippies will be piqued that Peak Oil has, er, peaked. It’s over, according to Citigroup, thanks to pesky human innovation and progress.

Salamanders are the latest species to not need saving, thanks to their ability to adapt quickly to environmental changes.

Salamanders, he found in a study published in the journal Scientific Reports, which is published by Nature Publishing Group, can evolve fairly rapidly — in 10 to 20 generations — in response to the chemical runoff found in many roadside ponds.

Cassava, a root source of carbohydrate, is set to thrive if global warming gets rolling. It is already eaten daily by 500 million people and could replace crops that may fair poorly in slightly milder weather. That sound you hear is another Paul Ehrlich face palm.

Pushing back against warmist propaganda in Aussie schools, an offer to give 300 free Ian Plimer books to educators.

Remember when London, Manhattan and other popular world cities were to disappear under rising seas? Ain’t happening:

hippies: simply rotate the graph 90° left to restore cozy worldview

Australia was warned that drought was the new normal thanks to global warming, and sure enough, reservoirs are set to spill their dams. Wait, what?

Part Four: Global Hottie

The Avengers movie is released in May, and a new trailer is out that’s pretty entertaining. While not usually a superhero movie fan, this one is written and directed by Joss Whedon, of Firefly. So yeah, I’ll buy a ticket. If you’re on the fence, here’s a couple of good reasons to see it: Scarlett Johansson.

*click*

Thanks for reading. For those inclined, save a thought or say a prayer for the friends and family of Andrew Breitbart, who passed away too soon today.

NOTE: Oh my, another link from Anthony at WUWT for the Gleick water movie story. At this rate he’ll want to keep his pipe and slippers here. Welcome back Wattsians, Wattsistas, Wattsbros and Watterati. For you are legion, or hordes, or maybe swarms.

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Feb. 23rd 2012

Dolphins are non-human persons, a man who cut animals in half for fun and profit wants to build eco-homes and Britain saved Kenyan rainmakers from global warming.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

If you didn’t predict this week’s winner, you must live in a cave. If that happens to be the case, welcome, Taliban readers.

Peter Gleick, co-founder and president of the Pacific Institute, faked an identity to solicit and release the same Heartland Institute documents that won DeSmogBlog the HOTW award last week.

The rest, as they say, is comedy.

Peter Gleick, the man behind the curtain

In the days since Gleick’s confession, he’s been tossed under the bus by Time magazine, the AGU, the NCSE, Andy Revkin of DotEarth and even the Pacific Institute is looking sideways at him:

The Board of Directors of the Pacific Institute is deeply concerned and is actively reviewing information about the recent events involving its president, Dr. Peter Gleick, and documents pertaining to the Heartland Institute. Neither the board nor the staff of the Pacific Institute knew of, played any role in, or condones these events. As facts emerge and are confirmed, the Board will inform all stakeholders of our findings and of any actions based on these findings. In the meantime we maintain our commitment to the smooth operations, governance, and mission of the Pacific Institute.

Sounds like mission #1 is to let Gleick slip under the bus. Unless having him sleep with the fishes is more the style at the Pacific Institute. Either way, hippie down.

Gleick isn’t entirely alone. Joe Romm stands shoulder to shoulder with him in spittle-flecked apoplexy. If that makes pesky Pete feel any better, he may be further gone that even Megan McArdle thinks.

The faked memo that turned deniergate into fakegate into Gleickgate remains a mystery. Gleick copped to obtaining and distributing the documents, but not to faking the memo that beclowned the warmist blogosphere. Anthony Watts is crowdsourcing the effort to find the author, which should make whoever wrote it very nervous. If we learned one thing in the last week or so, it’s that skeptics are very, very good at figuring things out:

…sceptics have some obvious strengths. The first and most obvious is an eye to detail and meticulous picking apart of data among a sizeable camp of sceptics. They are used to poring over data, of looking behind the obvious and of teasing things out of the most unlikely sources. These skills are highly prized in sceptic circles – just as they used to be prized in scientific circles.

… Again and again the sceptic camp shows itself to be worthy of the name. Nothing is taken on trust, everything is challenged and the data checked.

The Watts crowd-sourcing effort faces an uphill battle, because the geniuses at DeSmogBlog have already verified the document as real. Brendan DeMille and Richard Littlemore of DeSmog hired a crack team of document specialists and were told the thing was for realsies. Any questions can be directed to the independent document specialists, Brendan DeMille and Richard Littlemore. Wait, what?

We congratulate Peter Gleick for his second HOTW award and wish him luck in his new career making up Amazon reviews.

Part Two: Warmists

Modern art guru Damien Hirst is to build 500 eco-homes in Devon. Rumors that each abode comes complete with a farm animal freshly sliced in two and preserved in formaldehyde were unconfirmed.

Greenpeace leader Kumi Nadoo says “Mother Earth is screaming“, to which the only appropriate response is ‘well get off her foot.” rimshot. I’m here all week, tip your waitress.

Aussie homeowners will have to sort food scraps from other garbage soon, which is a problem for folks who live in a hot climate. No worries, mate, keep it in a second fridge:

Most people will try to keep their food waste in the fridge. At least a fridge offers some hope of keeping the sweet smell of putrefaction to a minimum. Others will no doubt invest in a second fridge solely for garbage purposes, which will soak up some of the fossil fuel energy the touchy-feely councillors and their highly-paid staff dream they are saving.

Oops.

The President of the Royal Society is upset that children don’t know the difference between astronomy and astrology.

Sir Paul Nurse said many young people were unable to distinguish between “nonsense” and science because they are not taught to differentiate between reliable and unreliable information.

Oh noes, the irony meter appears to have blown a fuse. It’s a pity the Royal Society abandoned its principles and cannot help moppets to understand the difference between science and advocacy.

In Australia, school kids may or may not know the difference between staring at stars and that funny pattern left by your lapsang souchong, but they surely know global warming skeptics are bad people:

Despite overwhelming scientific evidence that the planet is warming, there are still people who deny that is a result of human activity. The most vocal of these deniers are conservative political think tanks and the right-wing radio ‘shock jocks’.

For the best snark about what children may or may not know, Tom Nelson has had enormous fun with David Viner’s old prediction that ‘children won’t know what snow looks like’. Enjoy.

The best idea when it comes to teaching climate science is, hey, teacher, leave those kids alone.

Flipper is a fella? Dolphins and whales are so smart, they need to be reclassified as non-human persons. The idea is to make whaling intolerable, or something, but researchers have found that pesky dolphins are smart enough to run a scam on their handlers:

An experiment at the Institute for Marine Mammal Studies in Mississippi in which dolphins were rewarded for clearing rubbish from their enclosures highlighted their remarkable intellectual capabilities. One dolphin named Kelly began hiding large paper bags at the bottom of her tank, ripping them apart and bringing them to her handler one at a time to trick him into giving her multiple rewards.

why the long face?

A senior science writer at Climate Central suggests the top five jobs climate folks can pretend they do so they don’t have to admit they’re working in the climate field. Be proud, hippies.

Oh noes, the California Academy of Sciences figures earthquakes trump global warming when it comes to exhibits.

Computer models are so accurate that pretend fish thrive in balmy Canada, while real ones are ready for the frozen section at the local market before they’re even caught.

To frack, or not to frack. It’s by Weepy Bill, what do you think he says?

It’s 1984 all over again. President Obama’s Ministry of Truth says Republicans, not the President, turned down the Keystone XL pipeline. It’s as close as admission they made a mistake we’ll get, make the most of it.

The UK’s Met Office still wants a new Supercomputer. Also, any mistakes in weather predictions were not made by them, but by ‘non-expert’ reporting:

The National Oceanography Centre told the committee that the Met’s bad rep was “largely due to sensationalist media reporting and shortcomings in how probability and risk were understood by non-experts”.

Wouldn’t it just be easier for the forecasters to cross their fingers when they read out the weather?

Old religion gets new religion and says pollution goes against God’s will.

Remember the global warming will cause jellyfish swarms to devour the planet predictions? Yeah, nevermind.

This section usually ends with a la Laframboise moment, but she’s been quiet this week. Maybe she’s been busy with something else. It’s worth noting that the man who left a 1-star review of her book suffered a career-ending scandal this week. Coincidence?

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Carbon taxes are only good for one thing, ending political careers. In Canada, British Columbia is edging toward a reveral of its pioneering carbon tax, while in Australia the cost of their tax is becoming apparent. Already, Julia Gillard is taking the long way to work to avoid bus lanes.

Weather in Australia refuses to follow the warmist narrative, and people who were promised perpetual drought but are awash in rain are beginning to notice.

Half a million Germans are sitting in the dark because they cannot afford power. Thanks, renewables.

Coke may be it, but it’s a Koch who may get hit. Charles Koch gets threats, lots of ’em.

CO2 is innocent, says Tim Ball:

…CO2 is not a greenhouse gas, as demonstrated in the book Slaying the Sky Dragon. Warmists claim their computer models prove it. Skeptics do it by talking about climate sensitivity. They are both wrong, but the Skeptics are still practicing science and will adjust their views. It’s the difference between the science and political science of climatology.

Wind power in America finally runs out of other people’s money and suddenly is no longer a good idea.

Going green only makes sense if you hate Gaia:

…when environmentalists convinced Congress to reduce the amount of water in toilet tanks, the only thing they accomplished was to require that the newer, smaller tanks had be flushed twice to rid he toilet of feces and urine, i.e., more use of water, not less. The EPA has just issued a ruling they claim is necessary to reduce mercury emissions despite the fact that your average volcanic eruption puts more into the atmosphere than any human imposed restrictions could ever achieve. Congress, however, passed a law banning 100-watt incandescent light bulbs, thus requiring people to purchase mercury-filled ones that, if broken, require a hazmat team to clean up after.

Environmentalism is essentially irrational.

As wind power and solar projects fall apart at huge cost to the nations daft enough to chase the green dream, another green dream is born. Tidal power. It’s time to fillet fish with giant propellers of doom in their soggy habitat, they’ve had it too easy for too long.

non-human persons hardest hit

Climate science is junk science. If nothing else it explains why they won’t share their data.

Uh oh. We could burn ALL of Canada’s oilsands and it wouldn’t make a difference to Gaia:

Swart and Weaver conclude the impact of burning all the economically viable proven reserve of Alberta’s oilsands — all 170 billion barrels — would be negligible. Burning all the proven reserve between 2012 and 2062, they say, would raise global temperatures by just 0.02 C to 0.05 C. Burning up all the oil in the areas currently being mined would have even less impact.

Take that, hippies.

Al Gore went to Antarctica to watch the ice melt, just in time for a new study to find that there’s been no ice loss in 30 years. Pesky science.

The ‘scientific consensus’, deconstructed:

One might infer from the Trenberth letter that scientific facts are determined by majority vote. Some postmodern philosophers have made such claims. But scientific facts come from observations, experiments and careful analysis, not from the near-unanimous vote of some group of people.

The EU might be heading into a trade war over its plans to tax airlines for their emissions. Another brewing trade war with Canada has just been averted over the oilsands, for now at least. Perhaps when the Euro fall apart, the EU will stop acting daft and get on with the important stuff again, like determining how bendy bananas should be.

The UK spent £1.5 billion fighting global warming overseas. Some of it was spent on methodology climate scientists would instantly recognize :

A project in western Kenya to help indigenous Nganyi rainmakers, who were being undermined by extreme weather conditions caused by changes in the climate, was launched in 2008 as part of a £25 million climate change adaptation programme funded by Dfid. The project aimed to bring the rainmakers together with Government meteorologists to produce a “consensus forecast” before relaying it back to village farmers, who were said to be losing trust in traditional methods which could not cope with the apparent changes in climate.

Even Kenyan rainmakers know that lousy forecasts are caused by global warming, not, er, lousy forecasts.

The Whitehouse missed a deadline to release Solyndra documentation, because SHUT UP.

Words to strike fear into a hippie heart: “Is catastrophic global warming, like the Millenium Bug, a mistake?“Fortunately, greens are able to rely on sound scientific theory and their personal integrity to persuade people not to make a comparison between Y2K and global warming. Oh, wait.

Part Four: Global Hottie

This week’s hottie comes by special request, and while the emailer forgot to attach a bag of money to his plea for some Mary Louise Parker to grace the round-up, I couldn’t think of a good reason not to oblige. You’re welcome, cheapskate.

*gleick* 😉

Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Feb.16th 2012

Breaking the ice isn’t as easy as it used to be, the walrus of love may be endangered, and will we ever learn the secret of the zombie seal mummies of the Antarctic?

Astute readers will notice that the h-word is back in the post title, because, well because, that’s why.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

It would be churlish to not award HOTW to the exuberant hippies at DeSmogBlog. They are genuinely chuffed to little pieces about documents they claim prove the Heartland Institute funded climate skeptic scientists and bloggers.

A full post on the topic was posted yesterday, in case you missed it. The short version is that warmists are far too happy about sharing the fact they’ve been out-messaged, out-played and out-classed by a small group of scientists and writers who had access to a tiny fraction of the financial resources given to the global warming community.

As soon as the news broke, the usual suspects swarmed on to the revelations as if it had never been possible an organization might support others of like mind. I guess they never heard of George Soros, or ever gave a second thought to where Al Gore found $300 million to advertise global warming. Bless their little hemp socks.

Since yesterday’s post, the Heartland Institute has released an official comment. It seems that a lot of what was published was true, but the document titled Confidential Memo: 2012 Heartland Climate Strategy is a fake:

One document, titled “Confidential Memo: 2012 Heartland Climate Strategy,” is a total fake apparently intended to defame and discredit The Heartland Institute. It was not written by anyone associated with The Heartland Institute. It does not express Heartland’s goals, plans, or tactics. It contains several obvious and gross misstatements of fact.

It looks like someone wasn’t content with getting their hands on the numbers, but felt the need to further gild the lily. Don’t be surprised, these are warmists, exaggerating data and making up stuff is what they do.

Heartland intends to pursue whoever persuaded an insider to send them the documents:

The stolen documents were obtained by an unknown person who fraudulently assumed the identity of a Heartland board member and persuaded a staff member here to “re-send” board materials to a new email address. Identity theft and computer fraud are criminal offenses subject to imprisonment. We intend to find this person and see him or her put in prison for these crimes.

This threat has hippies howling in protest. How, they cry, can Heartland go after the ‘whistleblower’ in this case and not have a problem with Climategate? But that argument is irrelevant. Heartland has no control over the investigation into the leaks from East Anglia’s motley CRU, and it’s not Heartland’s fault if the authorities are too inept to find the leaker, or hacker, whichever it was.

But, consider this. Given the efficiency and effectiveness of Heartland’s donations in the fight against the global warming alarmist movement, there’s little doubt that the person who impersonated a staff member in order to get the ‘secret’ documents will be found, and perhaps prosecuted.

For now, we congratulate the DeSmogBlog crew for their big score and winning Hippie of the Week, and we look forward to the inevitable, delicious fallout when it all blows up in their faces.

Part Two: Warmists

You may recall the Grister who felt so guilty about flying to a wedding that she vowed to offset all her carbon emissions for the trip. It’s not going well, so she decided to do what hippies always do, get everyone to pay for her jaunt:

Frustrated with my slow progress, I reached outside of myself and realized that, you know what? It takes a village to offset 1,858 pounds of CO2, and I’m going to get my neighbors involved in the effort, whether they like it or not. So I set out to start a compost program for my building.

Funny how only she took the flight, but it takes the entire building to offset her personal travel, huh? So much for the worth of her ‘vow’ to Gaia:

I vow to directly and personally offset every pound of carbon dioxide created by our Seattle-Denver-Austin-Marfa excursion by cutting back on my carbon footprint at home.

This was going to win Elisabeth Kwak-Hefferan the coveted HOTW, before DeSmog stole it from under her nose.

Phil Jones, front man of the motley CRU, came in for some criticism for flying to Tahiti for a conference. It turns out that Prof. Jones has flown 250,000 miles in the last five years. Why does he hate Gaia so?

Weepy Bill McKibben blamed global warming for the damage done to his home state of Vermont  by Hurricane Irene, because Bill doesn’t know the difference between weather and climate, among many other things. He’s pretending to be Dan Rather and urging the Senate to have ‘courage’ when it comes to supporting the President’s Keystone kibosh.

Aussie socialists want people to drive windmills to work, or something.

Canadian academic Ian Clark suggests environmentalists have lost their way:

The environmental movement has lost its way. Saving whales and fighting for endangered species were worthy causes, but taking on the oil sands at any cost and any misrepresentation of the facts will accomplish nothing good for Canadians.

We have many serious environmental problems from overfishing of the oceans, coastal eutrophication, and habitat loss. Let’s focus on those. Perhaps we use too much energy and need more conservation. This will come through education and technologies to improve efficiencies. Let’s focus on that. Cutting off the oil sands energy supply will not reduce our addiction to fossil fuels. It will only require North Americans to import more.

Hippies are the ultimate ‘party of no’ and default to knee-jerk opposition of anything related to increasing energy supply. Which is why some folks call them an enemy of America.

The Met. Office has a warm bias. 11 of their last 12 year predictions for global temperatures have been too high. That’s not good, but because this is pointed out by the BBC, we get bonus tortured logic:

Some scientists who I have spoken to suggest that one of problems is the lack of observations in the Arctic, which is known to have warmed faster than other parts of the world.  They point out that if proper account was taken of this area of the world, then the overall observed global temperature would be higher, a point acknowledged by the Met Office when I spoke to them earlier this week.

In short, it could be that the observations are wrong, with computer predictions right all along.

Pesky nature, not following the models.

Oh noes, global warming will ruin Valentines Day. The walrus of love hardest hit.

how YOU doin'?

The Guardian choked out the news that Himalayan glaciers aren’t melting as predicted, but warns readers not to jump to ‘simplistic conclusions’. Like climate ‘scientists’ and journalists are full of it. Yeah that sort of simplistic conclusion.

Good news, the UN is plotting a global green economy. What could possibly go wrong?

Remember the BBC ‘Weather Test’ that was to pitch the Met Office against Piers Corbyn and others? It’s descended into farce, in large part because the BBC man leading the effort has credibility issues:

…seven of the eight forecasters and bodies asked to take part have not agreed, with two blaming Mr Harrabin for undermining the study’s credibility, claiming that his reputation is tarnished by his close links to green groups who believe in man-made climate change.

Australia’s government is spinning faster than a wind turbine in a cyclone to make the carbon tax something the public will swallow. Yeah, good luck with that. At least they can still get to the kids, even if the parents aren’t buying it.

Oh noes, a German business that wanted to attach large sails to boats to save the planet, is going out of business. The founder of the firm has vowed to return with a new venture making buggy whips. I may have made that up.

Being a warmist teacher means never having to say you’re sorry. Or wrong:

On the one hand, here is our advisory note  in which we tell you: ‘climate change was a complicated topic many found “daunting and confusing” and could be controversial, leading to many different opinions.’

On the other hand, here are our teaching materials which tell you: ‘a single conclusion, that carbon dioxide was virtually solely responsible for driving climate change and presented a range of “apocalyptic scenarios”.‘.

Uh oh, flying tundra, it’s back.

The IPCC gets another Donna-oscopy as she discovered there might be a little groupthink going on at Raj’s Policy Palace:

Before they began promoting the idea that human-caused global warming is a planetary emergency shouldn’t the authorities have done a bit of due diligence? Shouldn’t they have gone to some trouble to assure themselves that this conclusion wasn’t a case of groupthink within the relatively small, relatively insular climate science community?

But that’s not all, for this week, Minx the Merciless pointed her ray gun of doom at the hapless Royal Society:

..in recent years, while few of us were paying attention, the Royal Society was taken for a joyride. Three centuries of tradition were impulsively abandoned.  Pronouncements are now issued from the mountaintop about who is right and who is wrong regarding scientific questions. Moreover, the Society has become a hive of political activity – releasing press statements, making demands on politicians, criticizing democratically elected presidents in foreign countries, and harassing corporations.

Word to the wise among the climate community, don’t make her come after you, and if she does, don’t run. You’ll just die tired. Oh, and buy her book, it might just buy you some time.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

This is awkward. As DeSmog tries to convince the world that a couple of hundred grand from the Koch Bros is enough to discredit the Heartland Institute, Vivian Krause reveals that Canadian green groups have received $95 million in foreign funds. Note to hippies, Canadian chicks are out to get you, and not in the good way.

Oh noes, zombie seal mummies of the Antarctic fell victim to bad weather, or something, and microbes are thriving:

Mummified seals now reveal that communities of microbes in Antarctica can change much faster than previously thought, scientists find. The results suggest that climate change, and the subsequent alterations to the environment, such as temperature changes, would likely lead to drastic microbial changes as well.

If pesky nature can quickly adapt to changing climate, why do we need giant bird shredders?

A certain mannic scientist has tried to beat the Medieval Warming Period out of existence with a bent stick, but pesky ice cores prove the region was warm after all. Hockey sticks hardest hit.

States are suing the EPA over its soot rules. They’re lawsoots, or something.

The Danube is frozen over, so if you ever had the urge to actually waltz on the blue Danube, now’s your chance. The European cold winter also has 120 ships locked in ice in the Kerch Straight. Heckuva time to be short on icebreakers. If you’re wondering how that might have happened, take a guess:

…why did the NSF not properly maintain the US icebreaking fleet?  Could it be the faith in its own belief that global warming is reducing ice cover and therefore spending money on icebreakers would be a waste?

For warmists, good news is no news.

GOP Presidential hopeful Rick Santorum is the only candidate who didn’t fall for the climate caper, and he’s doubling down on his skeptic credentials:

“You hear all the time, the left: ‘Oh, the conservatives are the anti-science party.’ No we’re not. We’re the truth party,” the former Pennsylvania senator said at a campaign event in Oklahoma City. “Because the left is always looking for a way to control you. They’re always trying to make you feel guilty so you’ll give them power so they can lord it over you. They do it on the environment all the time.”

Can’t say if Santorum is a viable opponent to Obama or not, but he didn’t play tonsil hockey with Nancy Pelosi on a couch, so there’s that.
The wind industry in the UK is lobbying hard to keep subsidies flowing to keep the bird shredders turning. The government is likely to end subsidies for domestic heat pumps as costs soar, and the wind barons are trying to avoid the same fate.
The science is settled rattled.
Oh noes, climate change is caused by clouds and sunshine. Poets hardest hit.

Stimulus money was supposed to create green jobs. But in areas of wealth and full employment like Los Angeles, all they could find to spend the cash on was new motors for the city yacht:

You might think with the city in dire financial straits that they might sell off the yacht (which Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa insists on calling “a boat”). Instead, L.A. is “investing” $489,000 in federal taxpayer stimulus money to install new engines. Not that there is anything wrong with the old engines. Rather, it is that they run on diesel fuel (and hence fail to meet California emissions standards) and so are being swapped out for low-emission “green” hybrid motors.

A physicist has strong words for warmists:

Scientific revolutions are difficult and traumatic enough without the added inertia of government sponsorship. To put it more bluntly, scientists have difficulty enough admitting that they have egg on their faces. Throw in the Solyndras of the world and the United Nations and the entire anti-capitalist Global Left and the backing out of this theory will be nothing short of a fiasco.

If someone were, for instance, to come up with indisputable evidence tomorrow that CO2 has essentially no impact on earth’s climate, could the world accept it?

Well, I could, for starters.

The Gore Effect on ice – Antarctic Peninsula sea ice is almost double normal

Turns out that green jobs are like much of the green message, just myth.

oops

Another $825 million of US taxpayer cash is likely to disappear, or go mything, if you prefer, and some say the grand total is already $2.7 billion in green boondoggles.

Oh noes, 100-year storms are likely to happen every three years. It’s sort of like dog years, but for weather, or something.

Follow the money. Paul Homewood did, and through some FOIA-fu he discovered that British universities received £72 million for climate research:

It is evident that climate change research has become a very large industry in its own right. What university can afford to turn down a million or so every year? How many will risk upsetting the apple cart by allowing dissent in their ranks? How many scientists would be out of a job if the funding tap was turned off?

Let’s be clear about one thing. This sort of money corrupts. It corrupts both individuals and organisations. Climate research funding is agenda driven, rather than result driven; it exists in large part because climate change is perceived as a problem. Research that attempts to prove otherwise is unlikely to be funded at all and even less likely to attract future grants, while scientists who exaggerate the dangers or effects will have no such problems.

Part Four: Global Hottie

Canadian women are making hippie lives awkward, so we’ll finish up with a favorite Canadian round-up hottie, Elisha Cuthbert. Remember, she’s Jack Bauer’s daughter, so be nice.

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Feb.16th 2012

Breaking the ice isn’t as easy as it used to be, the walrus of love may be endangered, and will we ever learn the secret of the zombie seal mummies of the Antarctic?

Astute readers will notice that the h-word is back in the post title, because, well because, that’s why.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

It would be churlish to not award HOTW to the exuberant hippies at DeSmogBlog. They are genuinely chuffed to little pieces about documents they claim prove the Heartland Institute funded climate skeptic scientists and bloggers.

A full post on the topic was posted yesterday, in case you missed it. The short version is that warmists are far too happy about sharing the fact they’ve been out-messaged, out-played and out-classed by a small group of scientists and writers who had access to a tiny fraction of the financial resources given to the global warming community.

As soon as the news broke, the usual suspects swarmed on to the revelations as if it had never been possible an organization might support others of like mind. I guess they never heard of George Soros, or ever gave a second thought to where Al Gore found $300 million to advertise global warming. Bless their little hemp socks.

Since yesterday’s post, the Heartland Institute has released an official comment. It seems that a lot of what was published was true, but the document titled Confidential Memo: 2012 Heartland Climate Strategy is a fake:

One document, titled “Confidential Memo: 2012 Heartland Climate Strategy,” is a total fake apparently intended to defame and discredit The Heartland Institute. It was not written by anyone associated with The Heartland Institute. It does not express Heartland’s goals, plans, or tactics. It contains several obvious and gross misstatements of fact.

It looks like someone wasn’t content with getting their hands on the numbers, but felt the need to further gild the lily. Don’t be surprised, these are warmists, exaggerating data and making up stuff is what they do.

Heartland intends to pursue whoever persuaded an insider to send them the documents:

The stolen documents were obtained by an unknown person who fraudulently assumed the identity of a Heartland board member and persuaded a staff member here to “re-send” board materials to a new email address. Identity theft and computer fraud are criminal offenses subject to imprisonment. We intend to find this person and see him or her put in prison for these crimes.

This threat has hippies howling in protest. How, they cry, can Heartland go after the ‘whistleblower’ in this case and not have a problem with Climategate? But that argument is irrelevant. Heartland has no control over the investigation into the leaks from East Anglia’s motley CRU, and it’s not Heartland’s fault if the authorities are too inept to find the leaker, or hacker, whichever it was.

But, consider this. Given the efficiency and effectiveness of Heartland’s donations in the fight against the global warming alarmist movement, there’s little doubt that the person who impersonated a staff member in order to get the ‘secret’ documents will be found, and perhaps prosecuted.

For now, we congratulate the DeSmogBlog crew for their big score and winning Hippie of the Week, and we look forward to the inevitable, delicious fallout when it all blows up in their faces.

Part Two: Warmists

You may recall the Grister who felt so guilty about flying to a wedding that she vowed to offset all her carbon emissions for the trip. It’s not going well, so she decided to do what hippies always do, get everyone to pay for her jaunt:

Frustrated with my slow progress, I reached outside of myself and realized that, you know what? It takes a village to offset 1,858 pounds of CO2, and I’m going to get my neighbors involved in the effort, whether they like it or not. So I set out to start a compost program for my building.

Funny how only she took the flight, but it takes the entire building to offset her personal travel, huh? So much for the worth of her ‘vow’ to Gaia:

I vow to directly and personally offset every pound of carbon dioxide created by our Seattle-Denver-Austin-Marfa excursion by cutting back on my carbon footprint at home.

This was going to win Elisabeth Kwak-Hefferan the coveted HOTW, before DeSmog stole it from under her nose.

Phil Jones, front man of the motley CRU, came in for some criticism for flying to Tahiti for a conference. It turns out that Prof. Jones has flown 250,000 miles in the last five years. Why does he hate Gaia so?

Weepy Bill McKibben blamed global warming for the damage done to his home state of Vermont  by Hurricane Irene, because Bill doesn’t know the difference between weather and climate, among many other things. He’s pretending to be Dan Rather and urging the Senate to have ‘courage’ when it comes to supporting the President’s Keystone kibosh.

Aussie socialists want people to drive windmills to work, or something.

Canadian academic Ian Clark suggests environmentalists have lost their way:

The environmental movement has lost its way. Saving whales and fighting for endangered species were worthy causes, but taking on the oil sands at any cost and any misrepresentation of the facts will accomplish nothing good for Canadians.

We have many serious environmental problems from overfishing of the oceans, coastal eutrophication, and habitat loss. Let’s focus on those. Perhaps we use too much energy and need more conservation. This will come through education and technologies to improve efficiencies. Let’s focus on that. Cutting off the oil sands energy supply will not reduce our addiction to fossil fuels. It will only require North Americans to import more.

Hippies are the ultimate ‘party of no’ and default to knee-jerk opposition of anything related to increasing energy supply. Which is why some folks call them an enemy of America.

The Met. Office has a warm bias. 11 of their last 12 year predictions for global temperatures have been too high. That’s not good, but because this is pointed out by the BBC, we get bonus tortured logic:

Some scientists who I have spoken to suggest that one of problems is the lack of observations in the Arctic, which is known to have warmed faster than other parts of the world.  They point out that if proper account was taken of this area of the world, then the overall observed global temperature would be higher, a point acknowledged by the Met Office when I spoke to them earlier this week.

In short, it could be that the observations are wrong, with computer predictions right all along.

Pesky nature, not following the models.

Oh noes, global warming will ruin Valentines Day. The walrus of love hardest hit.

how YOU doin'?

The Guardian choked out the news that Himalayan glaciers aren’t melting as predicted, but warns readers not to jump to ‘simplistic conclusions’. Like climate ‘scientists’ and journalists are full of it. Yeah that sort of simplistic conclusion.

Good news, the UN is plotting a global green economy. What could possibly go wrong?

Remember the BBC ‘Weather Test’ that was to pitch the Met Office against Piers Corbyn and others? It’s descended into farce, in large part because the BBC man leading the effort has credibility issues:

…seven of the eight forecasters and bodies asked to take part have not agreed, with two blaming Mr Harrabin for undermining the study’s credibility, claiming that his reputation is tarnished by his close links to green groups who believe in man-made climate change.

Australia’s government is spinning faster than a wind turbine in a cyclone to make the carbon tax something the public will swallow. Yeah, good luck with that. At least they can still get to the kids, even if the parents aren’t buying it.

Oh noes, a German business that wanted to attach large sails to boats to save the planet, is going out of business. The founder of the firm has vowed to return with a new venture making buggy whips. I may have made that up.

Being a warmist teacher means never having to say you’re sorry. Or wrong:

On the one hand, here is our advisory note  in which we tell you: ‘climate change was a complicated topic many found “daunting and confusing” and could be controversial, leading to many different opinions.’

On the other hand, here are our teaching materials which tell you: ‘a single conclusion, that carbon dioxide was virtually solely responsible for driving climate change and presented a range of “apocalyptic scenarios”.‘.

Uh oh, flying tundra, it’s back.

The IPCC gets another Donna-oscopy as she discovered there might be a little groupthink going on at Raj’s Policy Palace:

Before they began promoting the idea that human-caused global warming is a planetary emergency shouldn’t the authorities have done a bit of due diligence? Shouldn’t they have gone to some trouble to assure themselves that this conclusion wasn’t a case of groupthink within the relatively small, relatively insular climate science community?

But that’s not all, for this week, Minx the Merciless pointed her ray gun of doom at the hapless Royal Society:

..in recent years, while few of us were paying attention, the Royal Society was taken for a joyride. Three centuries of tradition were impulsively abandoned.  Pronouncements are now issued from the mountaintop about who is right and who is wrong regarding scientific questions. Moreover, the Society has become a hive of political activity – releasing press statements, making demands on politicians, criticizing democratically elected presidents in foreign countries, and harassing corporations.

Word to the wise among the climate community, don’t make her come after you, and if she does, don’t run. You’ll just die tired. Oh, and buy her book, it might just buy you some time.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

This is awkward. As DeSmog tries to convince the world that a couple of hundred grand from the Koch Bros is enough to discredit the Heartland Institute, Vivian Krause reveals that Canadian green groups have received $95 million in foreign funds. Note to hippies, Canadian chicks are out to get you, and not in the good way.

Oh noes, zombie seal mummies of the Antarctic fell victim to bad weather, or something, and microbes are thriving:

Mummified seals now reveal that communities of microbes in Antarctica can change much faster than previously thought, scientists find. The results suggest that climate change, and the subsequent alterations to the environment, such as temperature changes, would likely lead to drastic microbial changes as well.

If pesky nature can quickly adapt to changing climate, why do we need giant bird shredders?

A certain mannic scientist has tried to beat the Medieval Warming Period out of existence with a bent stick, but pesky ice cores prove the region was warm after all. Hockey sticks hardest hit.

States are suing the EPA over its soot rules. They’re lawsoots, or something.

The Danube is frozen over, so if you ever had the urge to actually waltz on the blue Danube, now’s your chance. The European cold winter also has 120 ships locked in ice in the Kerch Straight. Heckuva time to be short on icebreakers. If you’re wondering how that might have happened, take a guess:

…why did the NSF not properly maintain the US icebreaking fleet?  Could it be the faith in its own belief that global warming is reducing ice cover and therefore spending money on icebreakers would be a waste?

For warmists, good news is no news.

GOP Presidential hopeful Rick Santorum is the only candidate who didn’t fall for the climate caper, and he’s doubling down on his skeptic credentials:

“You hear all the time, the left: ‘Oh, the conservatives are the anti-science party.’ No we’re not. We’re the truth party,” the former Pennsylvania senator said at a campaign event in Oklahoma City. “Because the left is always looking for a way to control you. They’re always trying to make you feel guilty so you’ll give them power so they can lord it over you. They do it on the environment all the time.”

Can’t say if Santorum is a viable opponent to Obama or not, but he didn’t play tonsil hockey with Nancy Pelosi on a couch, so there’s that.
The wind industry in the UK is lobbying hard to keep subsidies flowing to keep the bird shredders turning. The government is likely to end subsidies for domestic heat pumps as costs soar, and the wind barons are trying to avoid the same fate.
The science is settled rattled.
Oh noes, climate change is caused by clouds and sunshine. Poets hardest hit.

Stimulus money was supposed to create green jobs. But in areas of wealth and full employment like Los Angeles, all they could find to spend the cash on was new motors for the city yacht:

You might think with the city in dire financial straits that they might sell off the yacht (which Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa insists on calling “a boat”). Instead, L.A. is “investing” $489,000 in federal taxpayer stimulus money to install new engines. Not that there is anything wrong with the old engines. Rather, it is that they run on diesel fuel (and hence fail to meet California emissions standards) and so are being swapped out for low-emission “green” hybrid motors.

A physicist has strong words for warmists:

Scientific revolutions are difficult and traumatic enough without the added inertia of government sponsorship. To put it more bluntly, scientists have difficulty enough admitting that they have egg on their faces. Throw in the Solyndras of the world and the United Nations and the entire anti-capitalist Global Left and the backing out of this theory will be nothing short of a fiasco.

If someone were, for instance, to come up with indisputable evidence tomorrow that CO2 has essentially no impact on earth’s climate, could the world accept it?

Well, I could, for starters.

The Gore Effect on ice – Antarctic Peninsula sea ice is almost double normal

Turns out that green jobs are like much of the green message, just myth.

oops

Another $825 million of US taxpayer cash is likely to disappear, or go mything, if you prefer, and some say the grand total is already $2.7 billion in green boondoggles.

Oh noes, 100-year storms are likely to happen every three years. It’s sort of like dog years, but for weather, or something.

Follow the money. Paul Homewood did, and through some FOIA-fu he discovered that British universities received £72 million for climate research:

It is evident that climate change research has become a very large industry in its own right. What university can afford to turn down a million or so every year? How many will risk upsetting the apple cart by allowing dissent in their ranks? How many scientists would be out of a job if the funding tap was turned off?

Let’s be clear about one thing. This sort of money corrupts. It corrupts both individuals and organisations. Climate research funding is agenda driven, rather than result driven; it exists in large part because climate change is perceived as a problem. Research that attempts to prove otherwise is unlikely to be funded at all and even less likely to attract future grants, while scientists who exaggerate the dangers or effects will have no such problems.

Part Four: Global Hottie

Canadian women are making hippie lives awkward, so we’ll finish up with a favorite Canadian round-up hottie, Elisha Cuthbert. Remember, she’s Jack Bauer’s daughter, so be nice.

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Not the Global Warming Weekly Round-Up

There is no Round-Up this week.

The Daily Bayonet’s local utility is working on the grid, which means up to six enforced Earth Hours instead of snark about global warming. Oh, the ironing.

It’s fair to say that we’re concerned about the utility’s ability to fix whatever is wrong when they seem confused about the dates affected:

time travel, or something

If there had been a Round-up, you would have discovered that Joe Romm is either unreliable or lacks the courage of his convictions, that glaciers in the Himalayas haven’t melted at all in the last ten years and the Sierra Club should be rebranded Hippies for Hire.

Oh, and the seas aren’t rising, either. It’s as if Gaia doesn’t need to be saved.

The good news is that at I might be alone and cold in the dark today, but you still get a hottie. Kate Beckinsale is no stranger to the round-up, and she has another vampire movie out. Okay, nobody’s perfect.

*click*

You’re welcome. The Round-Up will be back next week, power permitting.

Global Warming Weekly Round-Up Feb. 2nd 2012

This week, giant bird shredders cause a Whirling Heat Island effect, Tesco gives up on carbon labels and a man stole a glacier.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

This week’s winner is a repeat offender, serial adventurer and shameless self-promoter. It’s the inimitable inevitable, insufferable Richard Branson, who for reasons known only to people in the UK was named the person ‘most trusted on climate change’. No, really:

Virgin tycoon Sir Richard Branson tops a poll of leading figures most people say is most likely to make them take action on climate change.

Prince Charles came in 3rd on the list, followed by Al Gore and President Obama. Unless you believe this story, on the same survey, which claims Bill Gates came first, with Richard Branson only in third place.Climate propaganda works in the same way as climate ‘science’, just choose the answer you like, collect $200 and pass Go.

he's a hands-on kind of businessman

Branson is so trusted because in his concern for the climate, he shut down his Gaia-crushing airline, closed the space-tourism business, sold Necker Island and moved to a yurt in darkest Norwich. Oh, wait.

Even if he came third and not first, Branson still wins HOTW because he’s just so daft. The tycoon is in Antarctica with Al Gore and Ted Turner this week, and it turns out that stupid is communicable:

Antarctica log 3 – the world will never have another ice age

If you look at the history of the world we are normally in an ice age. Only 10,000 years ago you could walk from Scotland to North Africa on hundreds of feet of ice. When it melted sea levels rose by hundreds of feet. The good news is we now know how to heat up the world. We just release an excess of carbon into it. So any time we’re heading to an ice age again that is what we can do to stop it.

Anthony Watts may still be banging his head on the desk to try and unsee the stupid.

Part Two: Warmists

Apple, the ichoice of hipsters everywhere, isn’t a very green Apple:

In its own supplier responsibility report, released a few weeks ago, Apple itself said that some suppliers were improperly discharging waste or that the facilities did not have adequate records or systems in place to deal with hazardous materials. It wrote that “112 facilities were not properly storing, moving, or handling hazardous chemicals.”

If only Al Gore could get a seat on the Apple Board and shake things up. Oh, wait.

Chris Mooney, a DeSmogger, is still trying to prove that people he disagrees must in some way be defective.

Studying wolves will help scientists ‘model’ how endangered species cope with global warming. Or, wolf researchers secure funding by using the magic money phrase ‘climate change’ in their pitch. The wolf guys are a lot smarter than the soon to be defunded squirrel boffins who dared suggest that squirrel girth has little to do with the weather. They must be nuts.

Prince Charles wants to save the fish, or something.

California has a plan to pay for its super-fast trains to nowhere: extortion.

Al Gore is down in Antarctica with a boatload of rich and famous space cadets who believe a trace gas essential to life on Earth is killing the planet with slightly milder weather. So naturally, the Gore Effect kicked in, because nature abhors a vacuum, even if it’s between the ears.

Oh noes, good green intentions come with pesky unintended consequences:

Rebound effects can be explained to some extent by simple economic theory – if price falls, consumption increases, and this means less energy is saved. But there are also behavioural theories that provide other explainations. These include “moral licensing” which is the idea that when people do something good they feel they have the license to do something ‘bad’, and the “contribution ethic” where people feel they’ve done their fair share and need do no more.

Which might explain Prius drivers, too.

Greenwashing ain’t what it used to be. UK grocery store Tesco is dropping plans to give every product a carbon label, because it’s hard work saving the planet and no-one else is doing it. That’s green leadership we can believe in.

I don’t know what Raj Pachauri ever did to Donna Laframboise, but Minx the Merciless is relentless. The head of the IPCC is hosting a conference on sustainability in India, in a style that she reveals is anything but sustainable. In a follow-up post, la Laframboise discovers that by ‘sustainable’ Raj means something else entirely:

…in addition to Pachauri’s desire to govern human behaviour in the name of eradicating poverty, we find a belief that people in rich countries should be transferring more cash to people in poor countries. This amounts to a rather naked argument that organizations such as his own, operating in countries such as his, deserve funding.

minx the merciless used her mind control ray of doom ™ to force Al Gore to judo chop Raj Pachauri. He never saw it coming.

Germans are turning their back on global warming fear, but one university isn’t taking any chances and SHUT UP, they explained.

Oh noes, global warming is a fundamental health risk. Better add it to The List, then.

Grister Christopher Mims couldn’t find any catastrophes to exploit to promote global warming alarm, but he did manage to find trapped heat that ‘equals 1 million Hiroshima bombs per day‘. Why does Christopher Mims hate Japan?

Tree researchers discover that western Canadian trees are drying out thanks to.. climate ka-ching change.

Uh oh, too many wind farms are bad for Gaia:

Even more controversially, the team claimed that extracting all the available wind power would produce big changes in temperature and precipitation. While they are not suggesting the world will warm overall, according to their model the local changes are comparable in magnitude to those associated with a doubling of CO2.

It’s the ‘Whirling Heat Island’ effect, or something.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

A chilly crook from Chile stole a glacier. The cops didn’t buy his story that it was just laying there and he’ll be swapping his ice block for a cell block where he can plead for ogive-ness.

The new EPA regulations for coal plants will cause 6 plants to close in Ohio, Pennsylvania and Maryland. The plants will be shuttered by September. Candle futures are up.

Ener1, another ‘green jobs we can believe in’ firm, closed its doors after burning through more than $50 million Energy Department subsidies.

Models developed by global warming muppet Jim Hansen turn out to be not very good for anything much, but especially modeling climate.

A UK minister has called the Feed-in Tariff subsidies for solar “one of the most ridiculous schemes that has ever been dreamed up“:

“It is already going to cost the consumer £7billion for £400million of net present value. This is on a product where you need the electricity when the sun doesn’t shine. “It is going to produce 1.1 per cent of our electricity supply and it doesn’t target the needy and the consumers.”

Spain has suspended all subsidies for renewable energy but in Germany, renewable energy is still wrecking the economy, and worse:

…these energy sources are weather-dependent and thus their sporadic supply is starting to wreak havoc on Germany’s power grid and is even now threatening to destabilize power grids all across Europe. The other problem: the power grid needed to distribute the decentrally produced green power is simply not there yet. They forgot to build it!

Next door, Poland plans to frack like there’s no tomorrow to exploit its huge shale gas potential. There’s nothing to worry about as Germany runs out of energy and Poland sits on a ton of it. Probably.

On the topic of history repeating, global freezing is planning a revival tour.

Pinch a loaf for the planet: Sea cucumber turds fight global warming.

save the sea cucumbers. oh, too late

Ice around the Aleutian Islands is disappearing so fast that this year there’s only an extra 300 miles of it. Wait, what?

The European Union has decided that fracking for shale gas does not need more regulation. Wait, who is this EU and what has it done to the people who want to regulate everything that moves?

Drill baby, drill, or the bird shredder gets it.

Steve Goddard uses Google-fu to thwart hysterical hippies who want you to believe all the warming is caused by your SUV.

Warming winters since 1998? Not in Minnesota. Pesky checkable facts, always meddling with warmist claims.

Serial Canada haters ForestEthics took nearly $300,000 to recruit firms to disavow tar sands oil. Which sort of spoils the ‘we’re outfunded by Big Oil’ narrative.

Uh oh, the wind can warm the world even without the aid of giant fans? We’re doomed.

Part Four: Global Hottie

Our global hottie has a connection to the HOTW Richard Branson. Kate Winslet pulled his mother from a burning building on his private island. Brave and nice to look at, what’s not to like?

*click*

No round-up next week. It will return February 16th.

Global Warming Weekly Round-Up, Jan. 26th 2012

The Round-Up double-dog dares the GWPF to be cunning, global warming gets yet another new name and an occasional skeptic is pillaged.

And yes, there’s a hottie at the end too.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

This week’s HOTW wants you to stop thinking. And don’t ask questions either. In fact, Naomi Oreskes wants you to just SHUT UP and do as you’re told:

Jury duty was in some ways difficult, but in one respect, it was easy: We were given clear instructions by a recognized authority and we followed them. No one argued about who had the burden of proof. No one suggested that the judge was not an appropriate authority, or that we should reject her instructions. On the contrary, when the time came to deliberate, we referred on more than one occasion to her instructions, and when the time came to vote, we had little trouble reaching a unanimous verdict. Driving home, I found myself contrasting this with the issue on which I work in my professional life: climate change.

Scientists don’t play the role of prosecutor trying to prove a case. Rather, they are the jury trying to evaluate the evidence. And they have rendered their verdict. The problem is not that scientists have become advocates, as some have claimed. The problem is that there is no judge, no recognized authority giving us instructions we accept, and no recognized authority to accept the scientists’ verdict and declare it final.

Oreskes wants everyone to accept the ‘science’ of global warming and fall into line. Pesky skepticism has no place in her mind, she’s decided the scientists are right, and that’s good enough for her.

Naomi Oreskes, killing the planet, one plastic bottle at a time

According to Naomi, we’d all be better off under a benevolent dictator to tell us what to do and how to live. Now she tells us, right after lil Kim shuffled off this mortal coil. The Universe has no sense of timing.

Oreskes has a history of hating skeptics, she’d like nothing more than a cozy communist system where the little people do as they’re told. Jo Nova has a pithy take-down of Oreskes, from last summer:

Years from now when their contributions are still recognized, Oreskes will be but a footnote in history classes of how poor research and largely baseless innuendo were used to serve a groupthink meme and feed a hate campaign against some of our best and brightest. No humility. No respect. No real effort to find the truth.

Hard as it is to believe from that description, Oreskes is a historian, not a climate scientist.

Part Two: Warmists

David Attenborough, the BBC nature guru who likes to trick audiences and worry about the weather, has launched a giant new wind turbine in the UK. He’s proud of his support for renewable energy:

“I think the wind turbine is a most elegant structure in harmony with nature.”

And by ‘in harmony with nature‘ he means an avian apocalypse.

Al Gore is cruising to Antarctica with Richard Branson and others:

Former Vice President Al Gore is taking his fight against climate change to Antarctica next week as part of a cruise organized by his Climate Reality Project. Gore and more than 100 fellow travelers will depart from Argentina late next week. Scientists, including climatologists James Hansen of NASA and Kevin Trenberth of the National Center for Atmospheric Research, will give talks during the journey.

They’re going to the deep south to draw awareness to melting ice which they say will lead to catastrophic sea level rise.  That’s the same catastrophic sea level rise that has Al so worried he bought a new mansion on California’s coast. Wait, what?

A new documentary is to be released which will take a look at the oil industry. It’s called ‘Greedy Lying Bastards’, which sort of gives away the ending, if you ask me.

Donna Laframboise could be forgiven for resting on her laurels after the success of her book, but no. Which is why we call her Minx the Merciless. She will not rest until no two bricks of the IPCC edifice are together and Raj Pachauri crawls over broken glass to her door and begs her to stop. Which would be fun to watch, but futile, because she’s merciless, see? This week la Laframboise discovered that IPCC scientists were, once upon a time, guests of the Environmental Defense Fund:

Now tell me, if some nice people offered you meeting space in glorious downtown Manhattan, helped you procure travel documents, fed you – and offered you goodness knows what other charming assistance, entertainment, and company over a three-day period – would you not be somewhat tempted to identify with their worldview?

The EDF isn’t a collection of newborn lambs and fluffy bunny rabbits. These are professional bloody lobbyists. You know – people who get paid to advance a particular agenda.

Apparently, WWIV has already started. I’m not sure what happened in WWIII, though based on form, its a safe bet the French surrendered, Italy changed its mind and America showed up late and got all the girls.

The UK’s Met. Office has boldly stated that a decline in the Sun’s activity will have no effect on the runaway effects of CO2. Based on their record, stout footwear and warm coat futures are up.

Et tu, Amazon? The Amazon (the rainforest, not the retailer) is about to become a greenhouse gas emitter. Gaia doesn’t want to be saved.

NASA’s resident global warming muppet Jim Hansen joined a FOI request for the Global Warming Policy Foundation to reveal its sources of funding. My advice to Lord Lawson and Benny Peiser is to agree to release the information, just as soon as Al Gore reveals where he got his $300 million from. Go on GWPF, I double-dog dare ya.

The Maldives claim that sea level rise will sink them and only other people’s money can save them. Maybe we should let them sink.

Warmist thugs are working to isolate and demonize weather forecasters who don’t follow the approved line on global warming. Because SHUT UP is all they’ve got left.

Oh noes, global warming causes perverts. Or something. Add it to The List.

Global warming became climate change which then became climate disruption, which  became a biodiversity crisis which didn’t catch on and now will be called sustainable development. Any questions?

A new $4.5 million polar bear center opened in Manitoba, and immediately proclaimed that polar bears are in danger because of slightly milder weather. That’s another year of funding taken care of, then.

Virginians got a peek at some of the emails Michael ‘Stick’ Mann’s not wanted to release. It doesn’t look good:

In PE-22, Mann alludes to his “dirty laundry” which cannot come out, requesting his correspondent to not pass the email or the data attached to it to anyone else (UVa has claimed no attachments to any emails were preserved on their system). In this email, Mann admits he has failed to follow the most basic tenet of science, to keep a record of exactly what he did in his research, and thus himself could not reproduce his own results.

A warmist who celebrated the Obama Keystone XL decision realizes that Canada is going to sell its oil anyway, that it’ll be transported on ships which is less green than a pipeline, and that hippies are the ultimate party of no.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Germany is spending 100 billion Euros on solar subsidies and manufacturing firms are running for the exits:

One fifth of every German industrial company has moved activities to foreign countries, or plans to do so, because of the uncertain energy and raw material supply. This is the result of a survey conducted by the German Chamber of Industry and Commerce (DIHK), in which 1520 companies participated

Soylent has thoughts on Germany’s problem.

NOAA’s failure to produce an arc has consequences for the predictions of warmists.

Remember when Al Gore said the melting snows of Kilimanjaro were a sign of global warming and would be gone in ten years? Yeah, nevermind.

Remember when Al Gore said more hurricanes would be caused by global warming? Yeah, nevermind that prediction either.

Oh noes, coral reefs are handling global warming better than expected. Who knew that Greenpeace would be more of a threat to reefs than the effects of a harmless trace gas essential to life on Earth?

Opposition to giant bird shredders is growing in the UK as politicians from all parties agree that blending birds in return for the occasional kilowatt isn’t a good idea. That and the fact that wind farms make air traffic control radar systems twitchy.

It’s the extinction-reversal event of the week. Grizzled Langur monkeys were thought extinct, but now they’re merely endangered.

darwinism is for wimps

Mercury in birds is a problem. In your light bulbs, it’s close to mandatory. Being green isn’t easy.

Geoengineering isn’t as simple as salting clouds or unfurling giant tin foil hats in space. Hacking the planet isn’t a good idea. We’ve mentioned that before.

click for full size

Bjorn Lomborg, skeptical environmentalist and ex-ABBA front man is to close his Copenhagen Consensus Centre because he’s been defunded by the Danes. Considering some of the things Danes used to do to people they didn’t like, he probably got off easy.

Sustainability is unsustainable. No, really.

President Obama nixed Keystone XL , a project that 51% of Americans support. Oops. Sen. Inhofe has a crazy notion to hold the President to his word on future energy projects. Yeah, good luck with that. It turns out green is more of a burden than boon to Obama’s reelection hopes.

Here’s a link with an inconvenient comparison between the Keystone XL pipeline and wind power. It also contains math, click at your own risk.

Tim Ball flays the IPCC for abusing the precautionary principle:

Rio 1992 was the political manifestation of the Club of Rome objectives. Scientific evidence, required to ‘prove’ humans were destroying the planet with capitalism and its fossil fuel driven technology, was already underway through the IPCC. The political roadmap was formalized in Rio as Agenda 21. Annex 1 of the Rio Declaration on Environment and Development lists the basic Principles. Most are specific, but the catch-all is Principle 15:

In order to protect the environment, the precautionary approach shall be widely applied by States according to their capabilities. Where there are threats of serious or irreversible damage, lack of full scientific certainty shall not be used as a reason for postponing cost-effective measures to prevent environmental degradation.

It’s a naked, incorrrect, application of the Precautionary Principle. As one person said,

Proponents of the Precautionary Principle are trying to smuggle in a default position: The environment trumps all other values.

Julia Gillard said a carbon tax would save Australia from global warming, and she was right. 2011 was the 51st warmest year in Australia. Unless that very average year of weather means it didn’t need saving, in which case, oops.

Part Four: Global Hottie

This week’s global hottie is German supermodel Heidi Klum, who may be offered honorary Canadian status for her recent success with Seal clubbing.

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Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Weekly Round-Up, Jan. 19th 2012

The Donald doesn’t want to look at giant bird shredders, the big yellow ball in the sky might have something to do with the weather on Titan and another scientific fraud is uncorked.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

This week, we have return winner. Weepy Bill McKibben was originally selected for the honor for a piece he wrote for the LA Times, but any doubt of his worthiness was eradicated faster than protected raptors on a wind farm when the Obama administration caved to weepy Bill’s tears for Gaia and axed Keystone XL yesterday.

Bill McKibben

McKibben needed a win, badly. Only recently it was revealed his original reason for clambering onto the global warming bandwagon was based on a false premise. Even worse, the ‘science‘ behind his claim that 350ppm of CO2 in the atmosphere is a safe limit was debunked. By none other than Phil Jones, the front man of the Motley CRU:

don’t perpetuate the myth that there is a safe level of emissions. This assumes we understand more than we do

For ‘safe’ read the points about Greenland near the end. Maybe not in our generation or the next, but the current levels of CO2 in the atmosphere will eventually cause Greenland to melt. This would be dangerous, so the safe concept should be avoided.

Bill can bask in the glory of the Keystone win, and another Hippie of the Week award. Or at least he can bask before he goes into hiding. As the front man for killing Keystone, he’s probably none too popular with the suddenly very angry  unions that would have benefited from real jobs.

LIUNA General President Terry O’Sullivan said. “Once again the President has sided with environmentalists instead of blue collar construction workers – even though environmental concerns were more than adequately addressed. Blue collar construction workers across the U.S. will not forget this.”

When the purple people beaters come for the greens, it’ll be ugly and one-sided.

So, who’s bringing the popcorn?

Today’s Weepy Bill Google juice is brought to you by fellow anti-oil activist Daryl Hannah, who is probably unaware that pretty much everything she’s wearing and holding in the picture was made possible by oil. Oh, the ironing.

Part Two: Warmists

Close second for Hippie of the Week was NASA’s favorite global warming muppet James Hansen, who said the oceans would boil and someone would runaway with his greenhouse. Or something.

Salon is afraid the modern world’s thirst for oil will cause at least three conflicts. Can’t we all just chop birds and get along?

Not even science we want to believe can be trusted to be clean of corruption and data falsification:

An extensive misconduct investigation that took three years to complete and produced a 60,000-page report, concludes that a researcher who has come to prominence in recent years for his investigations into the beneficial properties of resveratrol, a compound found in red wine, “is guilty of 145 counts of fabrication and falsification of data”.

There goes my healthy lifestyle choice.

Australians were warned that drought was the new normal. It’s not. Good job they didn’t spend billions on a desalination plant for fear of empty reservoirs. Oh, wait.

Nothing says you’re serious about saving the planet like demanding couture designers make eco-frocks for award ceremonies:

Creating a single eco-friendly dress each for events throughout awards season, everyone from Chanel, Tom Ford and Yves Saint Laurent, to Paul Smith, Valentino and Alberta Ferretti will be taking part, ensuring [Livia, wife of Colin] Firth will be one to watch on red carpets all over the globe.

We’re saved!

As American parents have educated themselves about the global warming scam, they’ve become more demanding that their moppets not be brainwashed in the classroom. So the National Centre for Science Education is offering advice to teachers on how to tackle evil denier parents. The UK does not have this problem, they simply detonate kids who won’t fall into line.

Uh oh. The IPCC and others have been pondering the devastation a 2°C increase in temperatures may wreak. But what if it goes to 11? Hundred, that is.

The EPA makes it very difficult for farmers to use pesticides:

if a farm has any water on its property, it could be required to submit a “pesticide discharge management plan”. This fun package of regulatory overreach includes:
• a Pesticide Discharge Management Team;
• Problem Identification;
• Pest Management Options Evaluation;
• Response Procedures;
• Spill Response Procedures;
• Adverse Incident Procedures;
• and Documentation to Support Compliance with Other Federal Laws.

What could possibly go wrong?

Tom Nelson is working his way through all 5000+ Climategate 2.0 emails, and is finding some real gems:

Oh noes, British hedgehog hibernation is affected by global warming. Add it to The List.

oh hai

The good thing about warmists is there’s one for every occasion. Global warming causes colder winters? Yep. Global warming causes milder winters? Yup. How cool (or warm!) is that?

The genius rocket scientists at NASA might not do any actual rocket stuff anymore, but that can’t stop them from studying global warming by recreating Venusian conditions right here on Gaia:

…the American space agency has built the 12-tonne “Extreme Environment Test Chamber” to simulate the burning temperatures and intense pressure experience on the planet’s surface. Scientists hope the new state-of-the-art chemical chamber, which includes two “Sapphire glass windows”, will recreate the toxic, probe-destroying atmosphere of Earth’s closest neighbouring planet. In turn, they hope it will lead to better understanding of climate change on Earth based on experiments of a planet baked of its water and suffocated by greenhouse gases and sulphuric clouds.

The fact Venus is 26 million miles closer to the fiery star at the center of the solar system than Earth has nothing to do with Venusian temperature, it’s a greenhouse gas wot dunnit.

Over 32,000 New Yorkers have spoken out on fracking. Three of them knew what they were talking about, the others all agree Mark Ruffalo is dreamy. The man who wants to lead Scotland to independence demands climate justice:

Speaking during his visit to the World Future Energy Summit in Abu Dhabi, where he is a guest of renewable energy company Masdar, he said the world had a “once in a generation opportunity” to ensure the poorest nations did not suffer from the excesses of the industrialised world.

Salmond is a smart man. If he wins Scottish independence, he’ll be leading one of the world’s poorest nations. Now that’s forward planning.

Meet the lovely, gentle hippies of Deep Green Resistance. They’ll kick you in the plums for Gaia, if you’re lucky.

Forget a trace gas essential to life on Earth. It’s the Soot, stupid.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Canada is in a fight for the right to sell its energy, and the Prime Minister is driving his green opponents nuts:

…let Harper make the sensible point we don’t need to take seriously every pearl of wisdom from these [Hollywood celebrity] hypocrites, and all the usual green suspects go crazy.

The same politicians and pundits who for decades have been demanding we reduce our dependence on the U.S. economy, now denounce Harper for agreeing, and trying to develop new markets for our oil in the growing economies of Asia.

Oh noes, not even global warming can save Canadians from winter.

A skeptic won £100 on a climate bet, though hell may freeeze over before he collects his winnings.

A skeptical academic speaks truth to power:

Unfortunately, a lot of politics has gotten involved with the sciences that relate to climate change, specifically because there are huge amounts of money involved, like hundreds of billions and trillions of dollars.  There’s a huge amount of power. Climate change is being used as a lever to try to push for a world government.  This is being done in international conferences sponsored by the United Nations that meet every year. The last one was just in Durban. So, unfortunately because of that, there is a lot of rhetoric and a lot of selective media coverage.

What warming there was last century had nothing to do with a trace gas, it really was the Sun, stupid.

Spanish birds and bats are being el shredded in muchos numbres.

Can gravity contribute to global warming? Maybe, maybe not. Discussions about gravity and global warming can cause embarrassing nerd fights to break out.

It's a trap!

CBS figures the Obama administration has another 11 Solyndra-type green energy failures in the pipeline. Half a billion here, half a billion there, pretty soon you’re talking about real money.

Invasion of the rent seekers. The UK’s greenest government ever botched the announcement of solar panel subsidy cuts, and a green gold rush materialized.

Hmm. Faint sunlight can affect weather on Titan, one of Saturn’s many moons., but close proximity to Sol can’t vaporize a comet. Pesky complicated star.

Donald Trump, the reclusive, rarely seen American developer, may cancel plans for a Scottish resort if an ugly wind farm is given the go ahead.

Global warming saves swans. Wait, what?

Everyone is happy the US backed off the 100-watt incandescent light bulb ban.

Uh oh, don’t look now, but its going to get colder:

Two notable, er, notes from the GWPF. In the US, shale gas is making electricity cheaper, and in the UK, Chris Huhne is the only man left on the planet who thinks renewable energy can make energy cheaper. Until the subsidies run out, that is.

Part Four: Global Hottie

Scotland got a mention today, so we’ll head north of the other border for your global hottie. She’s Tiffany Mulheron, of Lesbian Vampire Killers fame, and certainly appears to have what it takes to warm a sassenach heart. I haven’t seen the film. Yet.

*click*

Thanks for reading.

Global Warming Weekly Round-Up, Jan. 12th 2012

The BBC is busted for bias, a pesky trace gas essential to life on Earth saves us from a new ice age and mutant lizards will rule the world.

Part One: Hippie of the Week

It was slim pickings for nominations for a hippie of the week, but fortunately the Sierra Club came though in the form of Michael Brune, their Executive Director.

US readers will already know that when their lights go out it will be in large part thanks to the unaccountable activists at the Sierra Club, something they’re proud of, apparently. But that’s not why Brune is awarded HOTW, his recent blog about the ‘strength’ of environmentalism today proves denial ain’t just a river in Egypt.

In 2011, the environmental movement rediscovered that its most valuable asset is the spirit that brought millions of ordinary people together at that first Earth Day. Whether you call them tree-huggers, do-gooders, or Americans, it is these millions of ordinary people who refuse to succumb to cynicism and apathy that remain the heart and soul of this movement.

Brune’s problem is that while hard-core activists are as noisy as ever, their audience is shrinking. Also, while he touts the delay to the Keystone XL project as a major win, the fact is a new route is about to be proposed, and President Obama only kicked the can down the road to after the election, he didn’t kill it. As soon as he’s counted the hippie votes in November, he’ll approve the pipeline to appease his union backers. If he wins, that is.

Unfortunately for Brune, Amanda Carey thinks the green movement is dead in the water:

Extremist rhetoric has badly damaged the environmentalist cause. The Danish environmental writer Bjorn Lomborg and two enlightened environmentalists at the Breakthrough Institute, Ted Nordhaus and Michael Shellenberger, put the blame squarely on the environmental movement. It has no one to blame but itself.

Part Two: Warmists

Al Gore’s dream of being a television network giant is in tatters, but the global warming prophet profiteer is moving on to the next big thing, games:

…entries have been narrowed down to the 10 top finalists, which was then whittled down to four by Gore himself. Among the finalists are Greensquare, “a gaming platform that gives you and your friends a new, greener way to explore local retail store, restaurants and businesses”. Gore was particularly taken with REALiTREE, “a digital representation of our local environment and the role we are playing in sustaining its wellbeing.”

“Games are fun,” Gore told an audience at a “Gaming For Good” event in New York.

Or they used to be, until Captain Chakra got his clammy hands on them.

Fidel Castro is still not dead, but is worried about the threat of nukes and CO2 to Gaia. In related news, the Doomsday clock moved forward a minute this week. Coincidence? Somehow, a Cuban CO2 crisis doesn’t have the same frisson of danger as an actual missile crisis.

The Maldives government is pondering a move to Australia for the day when global warming claims their island paradise. Aussies shouldn’t sweat a Maldivian invasion, when they’re not posturing for global warming cash, they’re selling 50-year leases on uninhabited islands for new resorts. Oh, wait, we weren’t we supposed to notice that.

Global warming helps lizards learn more quickly.

I, for one, welcome our new lizard overlords

Last week, we noted Newt Gingrich regretted his decision to warm up Nancy Pelosi on a sofa while Al Gore filmed the action. He was a struggling ex-Speaker at the time and needed the money. But now Nancy is upset at being called the ‘dumbest thing he’d ever done.’ Or something.

Anti-whaling hippies may be dining on blubbery goodness on their long voyage to Japan to face charges. Expect very thin hippies to arrive in the Land of the Rising Sun.

The Guardian notices one of the reasons for falling support of global warming is activists:

…while many people sympathise, they’re reluctant to associate themselves with the views of green activists and turn away.

White House Chief of Staff Bill Daley is inspecting the underside of the Obama bus, and hippies are celebrating the loss of a man they blame for Obama’s climate inaction.

Soylent has fun with Volts, or as Ace calls them, rolling immolation murder-carts.

Say it ain’t so. Local councils in the UK don’t understand green energy. Does any level of government?

British pies will never be the same. Global warming threatens rhubarb crops. Add it to The List.

A new snake has been discovered in Tanzania. The Matilda’s horned viper has not only been given an unfortunate name, but was found just in time to be endangered. Some species are just lucky that way.

Time Magazine wonders if this is the Year that Winter forgot. It isn’t, but Alaska is the state that Time forgot.

The UK’s Secretary for Energy and Climate Change has landed in some legal hot water after using anti-terror laws to go after a wind power critic. Fidel never had these kinds of problems.

Tom Nelson finds the email that should bury the BBC and any pretense that it isn’t hopelessly biased in favor of global warming.

Richard Branson believes the airline industry will soon be one of the greenest in the world:

…personally I think that the aviation industry will go from being a dirty industry to one of the cleanest industries in the world very rapidly because we’ve only got 1700 petrol pumps to fill around the world to look after all airlines.

So that makes it okay to fly people into space for fun and profit. Right?

The WWF can’t get its own facts straight about polar bears and gets Nelson’d for it.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

Carbon emissions will save us from a new ice age, or at least delay it. That sound you hear is every hippie head exploding.

Patrick Moore, co-founder of Greenpeace, is no fan of giant bird shredders:

“They are ridiculously expensive and don’t work half the time,” he said. “And no matter how many are built, they won’t replace coal, gas or hydro or nuclear plants, because they are continuous and wind is not always reliable.” Moore told his audience the wind energy industry in Spain has resulted in a 30% unemployment rate among people under the age of 30.

Wind farms also have trouble coping with, er, wind.

Japan stopped subsidies to wind power, and suddenly there are nearly 70% fewer projects. The wind may be renewable, but other people’s money isn’t.

Global warming will be good for British farmers. Who knew that warm weather, longer growing seasons and a bit more plant food in the air could be good news?

Climate science is in an error cascade, and it ain’t pretty:

In extreme cases, entire fields of inquiry can go down a rathole for years because almost everyone has preference-falsified almost everyone else into submission to a “scientific consensus” theory that is (a) widely but privately disbelieved, and (b) doesn’t predict or retrodict observed facts at all well. In the worst case, the field will become pathologized — scientific fraud will spread like dry rot among workers overinvested in the “consensus” view and scrambling to prop it up. Yes, anthropogenic global warming, I’m looking at you!

Oh noes, Arctic freshening isn’t caused by global warming, and The Day After Tomorrow is still based on junk science.

why yes, this is a completely gratuitous picture of Emmy Rossum

Oh noes, part deux. Ocean acidification is entirely natural. It’s as if Gaia doesn’t need to be saved.

But wait, order now and get a third hh noes, free! Global warming isn’t man-made but natural, and predictable:

An extensively peer-reviewed study published last December in the Journal of Atmospheric and Solar-Terrestrial Physics indicates that observed climate changes since 1850 are linked to cyclical, predictable, naturally occurring events in Earth’s solar system with little or no help from us.

Watts Up With That passed 100 million hits. To add some perspective, that’s only 2,000 times larger than Al Gore’s Current TV’s largest audience.

Hippies are desperate to stop the shale gas miracle, and blame the fracking process for earthquakes, among other things. But in the US, fracking and earthquakes go together like, er, oil and water, and in the UK, geologists say fracking is safe:

Fracking, as the process has become known, is unlikely to start earthquakes stronger than magnitude 3.3 on the Richter scale, a level that typically causes no damage to property, and most will be around magnitude 2, said Peter Styles, a professor of applied and environmental geophysics at Keele University.

Who knew a good fracking could make the earth move?

Norway has discovered a huge reserve of oil in the Arctic, which gives the world another place to buy the black gold from without propping up stone-age thugocracies. Saudi Arabia hardest hit, with any luck.

Finally, a solution to global warming we can all get behind: do nothing. Don’t procrastinate, get on with it while there’s still time.

Donna Laframboise, aka Minx the Merciless, links the suspension of common sense in the financial world to the IPCC and global warming:

Normal rules were jettisoned. Ordinary morality was abandoned. Disbelief was suspended. The few souls who tried to sound the alarm were ignored, ridiculed, demoted, or fired.

In other words, the behaviour I’ve spent the past three years writing about isn’t unique to climate science. The same pattern is horrifyingly evident elsewhere. It’s as though our IQs have all dropped sharply in recent years. It’s as though we have no standards anymore.

Part Four: Global Hottie

Sometimes, for unexplained reasons, it’s good for the soul to look at Eva Mendes. This is one of those times.

*click*

Thanks for reading.